Question.......

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haute
haute Members Posts: 11,581 ✭✭✭✭✭
edited January 2010 in The Powder Room
Mods let this breathe a little bit before you banish it to PR

I'm asking this based on a conversation I overheard at my s/o mothers house

Ladies what do you think your role is, if any, in a household regardless if you and your s/o have children, and why?

I'm just curious.
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  • 5th Letter
    5th Letter Members, Moderators, Writer Posts: 37,068 Regulator
    edited January 2010
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    Moves thread to PR.
  • Carlos Bruise-Her
    Carlos Bruise-Her Banned Users Posts: 925
    edited January 2010
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    Here we go. Watch all the closet ? show their true colors
  • texas409
    texas409 Members Posts: 20,854 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    To bake cookies and let a ? beat
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] rubbed off from friction Posts: 0 ✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • haute
    haute Members Posts: 11,581 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    jamacia wrote: »
    Moves thread to PR.

    :-( don't be cruel
  • Shuffington
    Shuffington Members Posts: 3,775 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    did u over hear something lightly troubling?
  • fabionbackbitch
    fabionbackbitch Members Posts: 720
    edited January 2010
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    Be my chief of staff and I'm the president. I lead the family, I'm the face of the family, but everyone knows you're the reason the family goes anywhere.
  • 5th Letter
    5th Letter Members, Moderators, Writer Posts: 37,068 Regulator
    edited January 2010
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    haute wrote: »
    :-( don't be cruel

    I'm just playing.


    To answer your question the woman's role in a relationship is to be his right hand woman and hold him down in all aspects. To take care of home. To also be a friend and a lover.
  • t0wers
    t0wers Members Posts: 2,956 ✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    moves thread....
  • haute
    haute Members Posts: 11,581 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    did u over hear something lightly troubling?

    yea, my s/o mother is like my mother, old school

    she believes that it's a womans job to take care of the house, no matter what, no excuses.

    She asked her grand daughter to set the table, and the little girls mother flipped out because she never asks her grandson to do the same

    she then began to tell her daughter a long speech that included

    'she will never be proper young woman if you don't teach her these things'

    'your setting her up for failure'

    'your ruining her life by skewing what her responsibilites are as a woman'

    and my favorite

    'this is why you will never remarry'
  • fabionbackbitch
    fabionbackbitch Members Posts: 720
    edited January 2010
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    haute wrote: »
    yea, my s/o mother is like my mother, old school

    she believes that it's a womans job to take care of the house, no matter what, no excuses.

    She asked her grand daughter to set the table, and the little girls mother flipped out because she never asks her grandson to do the same

    she then began to tell her daughter a long speech that included

    'she will never be proper young woman if you don't teach her these things'

    'your setting her up for failure'

    'your ruining her life by skewing what her responsibilites are as a woman'

    and my favorite

    'this is why you will never remarry'

    She has a point. A lot of you birds think equal is synonymous with "the same". and it ain't. Just cuz we have different responsibilities doesn't mean I'm more or less important.
  • Carlos Bruise-Her
    Carlos Bruise-Her Banned Users Posts: 925
    edited January 2010
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    haute wrote: »
    yea, my s/o mother is like my mother, old school

    she believes that it's a womans job to take care of the house, no matter what, no excuses.

    She asked her grand daughter to set the table, and the little girls mother flipped out because she never asks her grandson to do the same

    she then began to tell her daughter a long speech that included

    'she will never be proper young woman if you don't teach her these things'

    'your setting her up for failure'

    'your ruining her life by skewing what her responsibilites are as a woman'

    and my favorite

    'this is why you will never remarry'
    Everything she said was FACT.

    But honestly, the mindset that the women have today which contradicts what that wise woman said, is the reason why marriages fail. Once women started going to work, the household structure began to crumble
  • Shuffington
    Shuffington Members Posts: 3,775 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    haute wrote: »
    yea, my s/o mother is like my mother, old school

    she believes that it's a womans job to take care of the house, no matter what, no excuses.

    She asked her grand daughter to set the table, and the little girls mother flipped out because she never asks her grandson to do the same

    she then began to tell her daughter a long speech that included

    'she will never be proper young woman if you don't teach her these things'

    'your setting her up for failure'

    'your ruining her life by skewing what her responsibilites are as a woman'

    and my favorite

    'this is why you will never remarry'


    ohhhhhhhh....not a good look .but your S/O doesnt have the same kind of mindset of what a "woman's role" is suppose to be right?
    You dont seem like the type who would go for someone who would put u in a box.
  • haute
    haute Members Posts: 11,581 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    ohhhhhhhh....not a good look .but your S/O doesnt have the same kind of mindset of what a "woman's role" is suppose to be right?
    You dont seem like the type who would go for someone who would put u in a box.

    No he's not like that

    I think household duties should be shared based on the needs and abilities of that couple

    for example, Im the one who usually cooks, mainly because he works late hours, and doesn't really cook healthy. I cook because I perfer my cooking and I'm home before him

    but I don't feel that I have to just because I'm a woman
  • MERYLISBACK
    MERYLISBACK Banned Users Posts: 2,003 ✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    im conventional with my ? . altho im a "career minded" person when i get married and start having kids i expect to be pregnant and barefoot (occasional business on the side). but i intend to be support and take care of my fam.
  • kat2180
    kat2180 Members Posts: 12,056 ✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    I think my role as a woman in the household will be dependent on the role the man I choose to be with plays in the household.

    If he steps up to a more traditional role I will follow suit.

    I'm not about to be superwoman though...working a full time job plus cleaning the entire house, doing all the laundry, running all the errands..it's not going to work like that. I might as well be by myself.
  • muzicluvr1986
    muzicluvr1986 Members Posts: 709
    edited January 2010
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    im about to move this to pr haute

    if u dont tell me hi, its gettin moved..actually to growin pains!
  • blackrain
    blackrain Members, Moderators Posts: 27,269 Regulator
    edited January 2010
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    kat2180 wrote: »
    I think my role as a woman in the household will be dependent on the role the man I choose to be with plays in the household.

    If he steps up to a more traditional role I will follow suit.

    I'm not about to be superwoman though...working a full time job plus cleaning the entire house, doing all the laundry, running all the errands..it's not going to work like that. I might as well be by myself.

    i honestly don't know any man that wants a woman to literally wait on him hand and foot...and i don't know when or how women got that idea that alot of men want a woman who would be that submissive...
  • haute
    haute Members Posts: 11,581 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    im about to move this to pr haute

    if u dont tell me hi, its gettin moved..actually to growin pains!

    hi muz!!!

    Why be so mean :-(





    Anyhoo I just think that the American household is changing so much, where women are becoming the primary income, I think it unrealistic to have such rigid roles
  • boom
    boom Members Posts: 2,083 ✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    the mom was right..
  • BackInWhite
    BackInWhite Members Posts: 23,591 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    that ? said closet ?
    lol
  • hummingbird
    hummingbird Members, Banned Users Posts: 2,341 ✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    haute wrote: »
    hi muz!!!

    Why be so mean :-(





    Anyhoo I just think that the American household is changing so much, where women are becoming the primary income, I think it unrealistic to have such rigid roles

    I make a good 20 grand more than my hubby does even tho he works more hours than I do, however I dont think the amount of income should have any bearing on who does what in the house. I jsut never understood the whole "He needs to do the cooking and cleaning because I pay the house note and he only pays the car note" type thing.

    We pretty much follow very tradtional roles in our home. I cook, clean, do laundry and he takes care of the cars, repairs, and yard work.

    But we do these things because this is whats comfortable to us and is the things we take the most pride in doing. I love when someone walks into my home and compliments me on how well kept it is or notices all the effort I put into making dinner And he is always gunning to get the award for best lawn that the HOA gives out.

    I tried the whole single take care of myself I can do what a man does thing, and I really got no enjoyment out of it.

    While my views are very similar to your s/o's mom, Im not as extreme as she is in thinking that it applies to all women because I know it doesnt. So I think it really just depends on the man and women and the dynamics of thier relationship.

    I personally could never see myself with a man who wasnt into the tradtional roles, I tried it and it just didnt work for me. And as much as I usually disagree with Fabion I agree with his comment "Just cuz we have different responsibilities doesn't mean I'm more or less important."
  • junegemini
    junegemini Members Posts: 2,775 ✭✭✭✭
    edited January 2010
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    i wouldn't say its traditional with us. i'll cook, but we go half on the cleaning and i rarely take out trash. its more of a teamwork thing with us, and it was his idea :) and it works for us

    but i think its because i make the most money...if he was breadwinner, he probably wouldnt wash dishes lol
  • MsSouthern
    MsSouthern Members, Moderators Posts: 21,791 Regulator
    edited January 2010
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    Since I just live with my kid.....

    I take on ALL the roles. Except the taking out the trash and walking the dog. My son does those things.
  • BackByDEMANDisCHINK
    BackByDEMANDisCHINK Members Posts: 220
    edited January 2010
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    I have very traditional views of women and their place in the household. Although, it would undoubtly depend on my career and my husbands career. I refuse to work 8 hours a day, run errands, come home to cook, clean, help the child(ren) with homework, prepare dinner, clean up again, get the child ready for bed, and satisfy my husband every day? Aint no way, aint no how. Thats where I would stress splitting duties between my husband and I. Now I CANNOT be a stay at home wife, I'll literally go crazy and I praise all stay at home wives who have 2, 3 and 4 kids...that job is more stressful than holding any upper echelon position at a fourtune 500 company. I do agree that as the women has left their 'position' in the house, things have went downhill in the family infastructure though.