Awkward times and places you had to take a SH*T (lol)

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  • Recaptimus_Prime360
    Recaptimus_Prime360 Members Posts: 64,801 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I haven't had any awkward times or places, but this thread made me think about.....

    you know how you be cool holding ? on the drive home....stomach growl and going through it but you clinch your stomach HARD and it calm down...but as SOON as you get to your block and your body know you're near home...you be parking and your body be like ITS TIME NOGGA!!!!!!!!!! NOWWWW!!! NOWWWWW!!!

    ? forbid if you got an ADT code to punch in. One time I just let the alarm go off...


    9dgzvbj19yd2.jpg


    NIG-GA! This is so damn true.
  • TheGOAT
    TheGOAT Guests, Members, Writer, Content Producer Posts: 15,916 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    This thread is sticky worthy based on 3 stories ive read so far alone

    But the powers at be will bury this doo doo driven thread shortly.
  • Recaptimus_Prime360
    Recaptimus_Prime360 Members Posts: 64,801 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2016
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    I have one but doesn't really involve me per sé.

    I'm at work when it was almost time to go on my break. It was the weekend, so the building is pretty much empty except a couple us in our department, and the security guard in the front.

    So I got this favorite bathroom spot on the other side I go to, mainly b/c it's empty over there. Go on break, walked to the other side, was stepping inside the bathroom when I saw the muthafuccin security guard on the toilet, wit the damn bathroom door wide da f*** open!

    My reaction...
    kempabxbfvqv.gif

    Yeah...I opted to go elsewhere.
  • KINGEC
    KINGEC Members Posts: 7,833 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    MARIO_DRO wrote: »
    MARIO_DRO wrote: »
    .... I SHYTED ON MYSELF LAST YEAR ON RODEO DRIVE... ONE OF THE WORST DAYS OF MY LIFE

    Lmao how

    ..WENT TO LA FOR MY BDAY... MY COUSIN STAY THERE... SO ME HER AND MY WIFE WENT TO ROSCOES... WE ATE, LEFT, GOT IN THE CAR AND SHE WAS LIKE, " IMA SHOW YALL AROUND"...SO I STARTED BUBBLING BUT I DIDNT PAY IT NO MIND... SHE TAKES US TO RODEO DRIVE...WE GET OUT THE CAR AND I FEEL IT!...IM THINKING," ILL GO TO A CORNER STORE OR MCDONALD'S OR SOMETHING.. MANNN ALL I SEE IS LOUIS, GUCCI, FENDI, CARTIER STORES... I WAS LIKE FUCCCCCCKKKK... SO I STARTED WALKING SLOW... THEY LIKE 20 STEPS AHEAD AND I.COULDN'T HOLD IT NO MO... I SEE A RALPH LAUREN STORE AND I GO IN THERE... BY THIS TIME, IM CURRENTLY SHYTIN ON MYSELF... SO I STOP BY THE SHOE SECTION AND ASKED DID THEY HAVE MY SIZE AND ASKED DID THEY HAVE A REST ROOM... EVERY STEP I TAKE, ? COMES OUT

    SO I GET TO THE REST ROOM... ? EVERYWHERE!!... LEGS, IM MY SHOE, THE BACK OF MY PANTS... I TOOK ALLLLL MY CLOTHES OFF AND FINISHED... I WAS SWEATIN LIKE A SLAVE I THERE... I WRAPPED MY DRAWZ UP IN PAPERTOWELS AND THREW THEM AWAY..MAN I HAD ? ON THE FLOOR, BOTTOM OF THE TOILET WHERE IT SCEWS IN AT... I CLEANED MY PANTS AS GOOD AS POSSIBLE...

    SO I LEAVE... MY WIFE AND COUSIN WAS LIKE, DANG, WHERE U GO? AND I SAID, I WAS LOOKING FOR YALL.... SO WE CONTINUE TO WALK AND NOW IM 50 STEPS BEHIND SMELLING LIKE STRAIGHT ? ...

    WE LEAVE AND I TRY TO JUMP IN THE BACK SEAT AND LET THE WINDOW DOWN...SHE WAS LIKE,NAW ILL SIT.IN THE BACK...MANNNNN, I WAS SOOOOO READY TO GET BACK TO THE ROOM.

    THEN MY COUSIN WANNA RIDE THROUGH THE HILLS AND ? ... MAN I HAD THAT WINDOW ALLLL THW WAY DOWN..
    MY WIFE WAS LIKE, "SOMETHING STANK"

    BY NOW, ITS BEEN 30MINS AND IM LITERALLY DISGUSTED.. SHE DROP US OFF AND I HURRY UP TO THE SHOWER...

    I TILL THIS DAY, I STILL GOT ? STAINS IN THEM PANTS... AND YES I KEPT EM CAUSE O LIKE EM..

    I swear to ? if this aint the funniest ? story...

    Im ? dead bruh...
  • Beta
    Beta Members Posts: 65,596 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I took a ? in my backyard once.


















































    And the door was unlocked

    gifs_201.gif
  • Ghostdenithegawd
    Ghostdenithegawd Members Posts: 16,231 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    My daughter ? in my brothers flip flop like a dead perfect ? emoji in his flip flop it was around the ? training days ? was hilarious


    I broken a few toilets in the hospital I work in
    It is what it is thereally are hundreds if not thousands of places to ? I have no remorse when it happens


  • Ghostdenithegawd
    Ghostdenithegawd Members Posts: 16,231 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    Last month on the way home the bus hit as I turned the corner on my block I started sweating of I was shaking as if I was going through withdrawal I was in the elevator holding my ? in with my family leg ran in the house and alms shifted in myself at the bathroom door
  • Shizlansky
    Shizlansky Members Posts: 35,095 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I'll ? anyways that is a toilet and toilet paper


    But with that being said.

    The worst ? I ever took was at Six Flags this year. I had no toilet paper in my stall and ppl keep walking in and out so I couldn't get to a stall with tp in and had to ask a person to get me a roll.

  • Will Munny
    Will Munny Members Posts: 30,199 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    theres two kinds of people in the world. Those who have sharted, as those that admit to it.
  • deadeye
    deadeye Members Posts: 22,884 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    MARIO_DRO wrote: »
    MARIO_DRO wrote: »
    .... I SHYTED ON MYSELF LAST YEAR ON RODEO DRIVE... ONE OF THE WORST DAYS OF MY LIFE

    Lmao how

    ..WENT TO LA FOR MY BDAY... MY COUSIN STAY THERE... SO ME HER AND MY WIFE WENT TO ROSCOES... WE ATE, LEFT, GOT IN THE CAR AND SHE WAS LIKE, " IMA SHOW YALL AROUND"...SO I STARTED BUBBLING BUT I DIDNT PAY IT NO MIND... SHE TAKES US TO RODEO DRIVE...WE GET OUT THE CAR AND I FEEL IT!...IM THINKING," ILL GO TO A CORNER STORE OR MCDONALD'S OR SOMETHING.. MANNN ALL I SEE IS LOUIS, GUCCI, FENDI, CARTIER STORES... I WAS LIKE FUCCCCCCKKKK... SO I STARTED WALKING SLOW... THEY LIKE 20 STEPS AHEAD AND I.COULDN'T HOLD IT NO MO... I SEE A RALPH LAUREN STORE AND I GO IN THERE... BY THIS TIME, IM CURRENTLY SHYTIN ON MYSELF... SO I STOP BY THE SHOE SECTION AND ASKED DID THEY HAVE MY SIZE AND ASKED DID THEY HAVE A REST ROOM... EVERY STEP I TAKE, ? COMES OUT

    SO I GET TO THE REST ROOM... ? EVERYWHERE!!... LEGS, IM MY SHOE, THE BACK OF MY PANTS... I TOOK ALLLLL MY CLOTHES OFF AND FINISHED... I WAS SWEATIN LIKE A SLAVE I THERE... I WRAPPED MY DRAWZ UP IN PAPERTOWELS AND THREW THEM AWAY..MAN I HAD ? ON THE FLOOR, BOTTOM OF THE TOILET WHERE IT SCEWS IN AT... I CLEANED MY PANTS AS GOOD AS POSSIBLE...

    SO I LEAVE... MY WIFE AND COUSIN WAS LIKE, DANG, WHERE U GO? AND I SAID, I WAS LOOKING FOR YALL.... SO WE CONTINUE TO WALK AND NOW IM 50 STEPS BEHIND SMELLING LIKE STRAIGHT ? ...

    WE LEAVE AND I TRY TO JUMP IN THE BACK SEAT AND LET THE WINDOW DOWN...SHE WAS LIKE,NAW ILL SIT.IN THE BACK...MANNNNN, I WAS SOOOOO READY TO GET BACK TO THE ROOM.

    THEN MY COUSIN WANNA RIDE THROUGH THE HILLS AND ? ... MAN I HAD THAT WINDOW ALLLL THW WAY DOWN..
    MY WIFE WAS LIKE, "SOMETHING STANK"

    BY NOW, ITS BEEN 30MINS AND IM LITERALLY DISGUSTED.. SHE DROP US OFF AND I HURRY UP TO THE SHOWER...

    I TILL THIS DAY, I STILL GOT ? STAINS IN THEM PANTS... AND YES I KEPT EM CAUSE O LIKE EM..




    @Sion