Snowflake Society Strikes: Schools ban "best friends"
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Members of the royal family aren't often told what they can and can't do. But just a few days into his first year of school, 4-year-old Prince George already faces a mandate: No best friends allowed.
Thomas's Battersea, the school George attends, bans kids from having best friends, Marie Claire reports. Instead, teachers encourage all students to form bonds with one another to avoid creating feelings of exclusions among those without best friends.
Jane Moore, a parent whose child attends the school, explained the idea on a recent episode of the British talk show "Loose Women." "There's a policy," she said, "that if your child is having a party - unless every child is invited - you don't give out the invites in class."
The trend of banning best friends has been growing for several years, and it's spread beyond European borders to American schools as well. Some psychologists and parents argue kids become more well-adjusted when they have larger friend groups and can avoid negative feelings associated with feeling left out.
Critics, however, say the approach robs kids of the chance to form valuable coping skills. By grappling with mild social exclusion when they're young, kids will emerge as more capable, resilient adults, these advocates argue.
People who support kids having larger friend groups in place of best friends tend to view these larger groups as healthier for nurturing a sense of belonging. "We try to talk to kids and work with them to get them to have big groups of friends and not be so possessive about friends," Christine Laycob, director of counseling at Mary Institute in St. Louis, told the New York Times.
Best friends, with their tight bonds and inside jokes, throw a wrench into that open environment, school officials contend.
In England, where the trend is still more popular, schools across South West London, Kingston, and Surrey have taken up the practice. Some accounts suggest the practice has moved up north to Canada, as teachers in big schools may shuffle friendships around to expose kids to a range of peers.
A wealth of research indicates best friends create value for people throughout their lives. One study recently published in Child Development found people with best friends enjoyed better mental health well into adulthood.
"We weren't surprised that better adolescent close friendships turned out to be important, but we were surprised by just how important they turned out to be into adulthood," Rachel Narr, University of Virginia doctoral student and lead author of the study, told New York Magazine.
Narr's study also found kids with broader friend groups tended to grow up with higher rates of social anxiety than kids with smaller numbers of closer friends.
And although anti-best-friend policies may help kids in the short-term, research suggests the strong connections found among best friends could be vital for mental health in a world where adolescents are lonelier
Thomas's Battersea, the school George attends, bans kids from having best friends, Marie Claire reports. Instead, teachers encourage all students to form bonds with one another to avoid creating feelings of exclusions among those without best friends.
Jane Moore, a parent whose child attends the school, explained the idea on a recent episode of the British talk show "Loose Women." "There's a policy," she said, "that if your child is having a party - unless every child is invited - you don't give out the invites in class."
The trend of banning best friends has been growing for several years, and it's spread beyond European borders to American schools as well. Some psychologists and parents argue kids become more well-adjusted when they have larger friend groups and can avoid negative feelings associated with feeling left out.
Critics, however, say the approach robs kids of the chance to form valuable coping skills. By grappling with mild social exclusion when they're young, kids will emerge as more capable, resilient adults, these advocates argue.
People who support kids having larger friend groups in place of best friends tend to view these larger groups as healthier for nurturing a sense of belonging. "We try to talk to kids and work with them to get them to have big groups of friends and not be so possessive about friends," Christine Laycob, director of counseling at Mary Institute in St. Louis, told the New York Times.
Best friends, with their tight bonds and inside jokes, throw a wrench into that open environment, school officials contend.
In England, where the trend is still more popular, schools across South West London, Kingston, and Surrey have taken up the practice. Some accounts suggest the practice has moved up north to Canada, as teachers in big schools may shuffle friendships around to expose kids to a range of peers.
A wealth of research indicates best friends create value for people throughout their lives. One study recently published in Child Development found people with best friends enjoyed better mental health well into adulthood.
"We weren't surprised that better adolescent close friendships turned out to be important, but we were surprised by just how important they turned out to be into adulthood," Rachel Narr, University of Virginia doctoral student and lead author of the study, told New York Magazine.
Narr's study also found kids with broader friend groups tended to grow up with higher rates of social anxiety than kids with smaller numbers of closer friends.
And although anti-best-friend policies may help kids in the short-term, research suggests the strong connections found among best friends could be vital for mental health in a world where adolescents are lonelier
Comments
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Smh. My boy told me they can't play football in his kids' school cah it 'causes arguments'. Obviously it ? ' does you're supposed to learn how to deal with conflict in a reasonable way when you're in school.
This is some ? and these new age parents and psychiatrists aren't thinkin' about the long term effects ? like this could have -
Yes, that'll prepare them for the real world - you know, where everybody treats each other equally. /sarcasm
Side note: I can see the not giving out invites in class ? but that "no best friends" ? sounds like a Drake song. FOH -
I'll go with what my moms and dad taught. Everyone aint your damn friend. You need a click of good folks to be around. ? all that we are the world BS.
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Who gonna hold u down when It s time to scrap
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IM not going to say they are wrong in what they are doing but I noticed As a parent I look at things differently than when I was a kid
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"There's a policy," she said, "that if your child is having a party - unless every child is invited - you don't give out the invites in class."
They do this here, i don't have a problem with this in particular.
The whole best friend ban is stupid af tho. I feel like you can expose kids to other kids in different ways. Keeping them from forming close bonds sounds counterproductive. -
lil ? goes to school?
man ? that if im the Prince its either the school comes to me and tutors me until i get bored or ? school "hey you peasant come here read this ? for me fam" -
There's a talk show called "Loose Women"?
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There's a talk show called "Loose Women"?
Over here. It's as much of a joke as the name implies.
Four old and usually ignorant hoes discuss the hot topics. Day time telly at its mediocre best -
i took mac donalds for my little brothers for lunch and the school told me im not allowed to do that because its unfair for the other children . im like wtf when i was goin school you were able to bring anything u want . so they made my brothers eat it in the office .
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Stupid ? . Your "best friend" at any given stage of life is that one person, male or female, that got your back and will hold you down no matter what. Some of those people still got you even if that was your 4th grade best friend. I know my "best friends" from back inna day still got my back and I got theirs. Those are some of the most important friendships you can develop and to deprive a child of that is setting them up for disaster down the road.
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i took mac donalds for my little brothers for lunch and the school told me im not allowed to do that because its unfair for the other children . im like wtf when i was goin school you were able to bring anything u want . so they made my brothers eat it in the office .
Hell yeah. My moms would bring me some ? from McD's, Burger King, or Burger Chef back in grade school if I forgot my lunch money or something like that. I got to eat it with the rest of the kids, not in the ? office. Tha ? kinda ? is that???
It teaches kids that sometimes you just don't get to have what the next man has and you need to be content with that. Life ain't fair nor does it have to be fair. -
CeLLaR-DooR wrote: »Smh. My boy told me they can't play football in his kids' school cah it 'causes arguments'. Obviously it ? ' does you're supposed to learn how to deal with conflict in a reasonable way when you're in school.
This is some ? and these new age parents and psychiatrists aren't thinkin' about the long term effects ? like this could have
Society of pleasure chasing, reality excaping.
One cant be friend with everybody. One cannot have it all.
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What happens if two kids don't get along? They still have to invite that person? Today's school system is making these kids soft. It seems like they want to award kids all the same. Kids that excell in whatever area will get the same treatment as the kids that don't do so good. It stifles motivation
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turning mafuckas too ?
the world aint a nice place......these mafuckas faking the funk -
Get used to this ? smh
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Elzo69Renaissance wrote: »Who gonna hold u down when It s time to scrap
Everybody gon fight everybody. Battle Royale with cheese. -
5onblackhandside wrote: »turning mafuckas too ?
That's the goal. A passive population that conforms to group think, which the elites control. -
my school had zero tolerance so fights had to be out of sight and nobody snitched, these kids will still weed each other out someway
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liberalism