staying friends with the ex

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knockoutking
knockoutking Members Posts: 72
edited September 2011 in For The Grown & Sexy
I wanted to know if yall had ever broken up with an ex and remained close friends after. Im askin cuz my girl is still real close with her ex whom she had a relationship with for 5 years(Im 23 she 22). She claims they ended it because neither of them felt the spark any more to be in a relationship with each other. I dont care much for the fact that they still friends, but what bothers me is the fact that she considers him one of her best friends. I dont wanna be one of them insecure dudes always checkin his girl for ? , but this doesnt sit well with me. Whenever a past relationship ends for me I try to distance myself from the ex rather than keep her in my life and if anything it just becomes more awkward the more close i get with another chick.

Do I have something to wrry about with my girl being close with this dude or no?
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  • louis the great
    louis the great Members Posts: 6,476 ✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    knockoutking wrote: »
    I wanted to know if yall had ever broken up with an ex and remained close friends after. Im askin cuz my girl is still real close with her ex whom she had a relationship with for 5 years(Im 23 she 22). She claims they ended it because neither of them felt the spark any more to be in a relationship with each other. I dont care much for the fact that they still friends, but what bothers me is the fact that she considers him one of her best friends. I dont wanna be one of them insecure dudes always checkin his girl for ? , but this doesnt sit well with me. Whenever a past relationship ends for me I try to distance myself from the ex rather than keep her in my life and if anything it just becomes more awkward the more close i get with another chick.

    Do I have something to wrry about with my girl being close with this dude or no?
    Yea they still ? *n................
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  • Bwoahmizzee
    Bwoahmizzee Members Posts: 6,962 ✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    I've never been real close with someone after I broke up with them

    I'm still cool with them but close..............nah
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  • blakfyahking
    blakfyahking Members Posts: 15,785 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    c'mon son you share that girl

    or you will be after the 1st time ya'll have a dispute


    ? justification is there really to be a CLOSE friend of an ex for? FOH
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  • Iheart~Cali
    Iheart~Cali Members Posts: 5,991 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    If they had a close friendship BEFORE you two got together, then you have to respect that. Although she also has to respect the boundaries of her current relationship with you. She shouldn't be going off and doing activities with him alone, talking everyday on the phone, etc.


    I can honestly say I'm friends with every last one of my exes. I don't know how it happened but I prefer it that way. My ex gives me relationship advice now.
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  • goat334
    goat334 Members Posts: 3,604 ✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    Iheart~Cali wrote: »
    If they had a close friendship BEFORE you two got together, then you have to respect that. Although she also has to respect the boundaries of her current relationship with you. She shouldn't be going off and doing activities with him alone, talking everyday on the phone, etc.


    I can honestly say I'm friends with every last one of my exes. I don't know how it happened but I prefer it that way. My ex gives me relationship advice now.

    Hey cutie........
    I bet if the shoe was on the other foot, she would be tripping.
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  • Saboi 10.5
    Saboi 10.5 Members Posts: 542
    edited October 2010
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    why would any man want to be friends with a woman????????
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  • knockoutking
    knockoutking Members Posts: 72
    edited October 2010
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    Iheart~Cali wrote: »
    If they had a close friendship BEFORE you two got together, then you have to respect that. Although she also has to respect the boundaries of her current relationship with you. She shouldn't be going off and doing activities with him alone, talking everyday on the phone, etc.


    I can honestly say I'm friends with every last one of my exes. I don't know how it happened but I prefer it that way. My ex gives me relationship advice now.

    yeh they've been broken up for a little over a year now and maintained their friendship. Just the simple fact that she considers him one of her best friends doesnt sit well with me at all. Dude goes to school out of town so the way Im lookin at it is that they just on break til he moves back hom after he done school and just agreed to do w/e til then. No way a girl and guy can be best friends especially after being in a relationship for so long unless there is still feelings there imo. Hell half of my ex's cant stand the sight of me the other half still want me back and all of them are still down to ? so this stayin friends business is some sketchy ? tbh.
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  • Iheart~Cali
    Iheart~Cali Members Posts: 5,991 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    goat334 wrote: »
    Hey cutie........
    I bet if the shoe was on the other foot, she would be tripping.

    Probably......
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  • knockoutking
    knockoutking Members Posts: 72
    edited October 2010
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    Saboi 10.5 wrote: »
    why would any man want to be friends with a woman????????

    because you want to ? her or they ? 's.
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  • Iheart~Cali
    Iheart~Cali Members Posts: 5,991 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    knockoutking wrote: »
    yeh they've been broken up for a little over a year now and maintained their friendship. Just the simple fact that she considers him one of her best friends doesnt sit well with me at all. Dude goes to school out of town so the way Im lookin at it is that they just on break til he moves back hom after he done school and just agreed to do w/e til then. No way a girl and guy can be best friends especially after being in a relationship for so long unless there is still feelings there imo. Hell half of my ex's cant stand the sight of me the other half still want me back and all of them are still down to ? so this stayin friends business is some sketchy ? tbh.

    I'm telling you that yes there is a way. My ex and I are both interested in other people, but still remain friends. No sex, no flirting, nothing. However your situation with her does sound a bit fishy I'll admit.

    Either way, I can see that this bothers you so there is no point in debating it. It's not something you're willing to deal with and you need to tell her straight out. If she chooses the friendship over you, well then you didn't need her anyway. You have to be with somebody who is going to put you first.
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  • birdcall89
    birdcall89 Members Posts: 6,009 ✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    look at it like this: are you good friends with any of your ex hoes or even any girls that your not ? ?

    you share that girl
    the_bachelorette_access_hollywood(1).jpg
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  • Dupac
    Dupac Members, Writer Posts: 68,365 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    ayo....how long u been with shorty?

    cuz after a while if u still ain't filling that void in her life.....and she still super defensive about their "friendship"...u can pretty much bet the house that some innappropt is going on there...

    either she doesn't trust u like that, she damn sure doesn't depend on you,...she's not intimawith you, and the two of yall aren't as close as you would like.....


    when ur everything in your woman's life the way ur supposed to be... not only would she not have a need for a ex that's a "best friend" she wouldn't even want to have a dude that might even make u the least bit uncomfortable around her.....
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  • spit_fiya
    spit_fiya Members Posts: 2,531 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    dusouljah wrote: »
    ayo....how long u been with shorty?

    cuz after a while if u still ain't filling that void in her life.....and she still super defensive about their "friendship"...u can pretty much bet the house that some innappropt is going on there...

    either she doesn't trust u like that, she damn sure doesn't depend on you,...she's not intimawith you, and the two of yall aren't as close as you would like.....


    when ur everything in your woman's life the way ur supposed to be... not only would she not have a need for a ex that's a "best friend" she wouldn't even want to have a dude that might even make u the least bit uncomfortable around her.....

    Preach........
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  • Tupacfan
    Tupacfan Members, Moderators Posts: 2,428 Regulator
    edited October 2010
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    ummm, NO! I don't stay friends, but remain civil..

    I think in ur case, she may have to be a lil more honest and blaunt with you. Idk..
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  • GhettoPolice
    GhettoPolice Members Posts: 96
    edited October 2010
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    Friends with her ex ? WTF ? are you serious..... Leave that chick today! infact call her right now and tell her goodbye.
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  • 5th Letter
    5th Letter Members, Moderators, Writer Posts: 37,068 Regulator
    edited October 2010
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    once its over thats it. i dont see the point in remaining friends.
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  • GhettoPolice
    GhettoPolice Members Posts: 96
    edited October 2010
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    jamacia wrote: »
    once its over thats it. i dont see the point in remaining friends.

    To keep fuking...
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  • thecomebacklegend
    thecomebacklegend Members Posts: 1,942 ✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    lol ? using this ? 4 dates and sum 1 to yap 2
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  • 7figz
    7figz Members Posts: 15,294 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    Damn. This is starting to make me feel guilty about being friends with one of my ex's simply because I know that if I was in your situation, I wouldn't like that ? either.

    But to answer the question, I agree with this:
    dusouljah wrote: »
    ayo....how long u been with shorty?

    cuz after a while if u still ain't filling that void in her life.....and she still super defensive about their "friendship"...u can pretty much bet the house that some innappropt is going on there...

    either she doesn't trust u like that, she damn sure doesn't depend on you,...she's not intimawith you, and the two of yall aren't as close as you would like.....


    when ur everything in your woman's life the way ur supposed to be... not only would she not have a need for a ex that's a "best friend" she wouldn't even want to have a dude that might even make u the least bit uncomfortable around her.....
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  • bull6599
    bull6599 Members Posts: 6,640 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    dusouljah wrote: »
    ayo....how long u been with shorty?

    cuz after a while if u still ain't filling that void in her life.....and she still super defensive about their "friendship"...u can pretty much bet the house that some innappropt is going on there...

    either she doesn't trust u like that, she damn sure doesn't depend on you,...she's not intimawith you, and the two of yall aren't as close as you would like.....


    when ur everything in your woman's life the way ur supposed to be... not only would she not have a need for a ex that's a "best friend" she wouldn't even want to have a dude that might even make u the least bit uncomfortable around her.....

    This man speaks the truth. Me & my last ex had a complicated break-up and we were still close after the break-up b/c she was still in love w/ me even though she was w/ a new guy. She would call me when they fought (usually about her still communicating w/ me) and he always thought she was cheating b/c she wasnt ? him. Either she need to end that ? w/ him or u need to end that ? w/ her. If it was u ol' girl wouldnt let that ? fly.
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  • turqiun
    turqiun Members Posts: 1,491 ✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    If she anything like my ex then don't really worry about it. I'm pretty close with my ex from like 5 years ago and a year ago when she had a man she would be at my house at 3 in the morning just chillin and ? . Trust me the hormones kicked in and I've tried to hit it plenty of times but she won't budge. She on some " thats's gonna ruin our friendship ? " but since me and her are real cool I don't mind, I just laugh it off.
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  • gns
    gns Members Posts: 21,285 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    alot of yall young ? need a big homie or a dam father wtf. Friends with her ex? come on son every 1s situations different but every x chick i got still be down for the do, 1 is in a relationship and hits me up sometimes for advice. That right there is prolly the closest u can be with an x and its cause shes far away if i was around her...well u know
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  • Bussy_Getta
    Bussy_Getta Members Posts: 37,679 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    im best friends with my ex, relationship didnt work but a friendship did
    never had sex with him after we broke up and i dont plan on it

    but forreal dont even worry about it, if shes being faithful then you good, if shes cheatin then you good too cause thats not the type of person you want in your life and you can just go find better
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  • sTaY_TrUe
    sTaY_TrUe Members Posts: 4,189 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2010
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    gotta keep a close eye on that, long story short. I have a friend who was in the same situation and his girl at the time who his now his ex is pregnant by her ex......
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  • koolvkid
    koolvkid Members Posts: 1
    edited October 2010
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    It's as simple as this there's a reason why you too r ex's just keep that in mind
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