How do you feel about other people disciplining your kids?

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Crude_
Crude_ Members Posts: 19,964 ✭✭✭✭✭
edited October 2013 in For The Grown & Sexy
How do you feel about other people disciplining your child or children and why?

When I pose this question I'm not talking about strangers either but rather aunts, uncles, grandparents, teachers, school administrators, etc.

What type of discipline do you prefer to use spankings, timeout, groundings, or what?

Please explain your position on this topic.
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  • 9TRAY
    9TRAY Members Posts: 6,830 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I have no Lil' one's ...yet

    I'll keep this thread in mind when that day comes
  • DNB1
    DNB1 Members Posts: 19,704 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    Chicity wrote: »
    Takes a village to raise a child is my motto

    U see mine acting up, correct them

    This...except teachers can get a bit to close for comfort...

    Teachers ain't ? , be on the IC all day arguing with Kat whilst the kids teach each other...smh
  • Knock_Twice
    Knock_Twice Members Posts: 4,324 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I aint wit the teachers or administrators....just off the strength of nowadays the teachers are around my age range 24-30 and most of the teachers (women) don't discipline their own kids. I'd be ok with 'older' aunts and uncles doing the discipline. The ones who 'knows' about discipline a child
  • 7figz
    7figz Members Posts: 15,294 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I don't trust these ? to do it, people are too full of ? .

    That said, I expect my kids (that I raise) to have respect for adults so call'em out but leave the discipline to the parents.
  • Crude_
    Crude_ Members Posts: 19,964 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    Chicity wrote: »
    Takes a village to raise a child is my motto

    U see mine acting up, correct them

    I agree I will elaborate more later.
    DNB1 wrote: »
    Chicity wrote: »
    Takes a village to raise a child is my motto

    U see mine acting up, correct them

    This...except teachers can get a bit to close for comfort...

    Teachers ain't ? , be on the IC all day arguing with Kat whilst the kids teach each other...smh

    This might be true but 9 times out of 10 those teachers such as myself you complain about spend more time with your child than you do.

    Sure there are some bad apples in the bunch like any other profession but you're incredibly foolish if you think all teachers are rotten or are lying about your child.

    Seeing as though the teacher probably spends more or almost as much time with your child as you and are responsible for educating your child I don't see the issue in teachers disciplining your child.

    When you can't discipline students you create a culture of students who don't want to follow rules then you come up to the school and wonder why your child isn't academically where he or she should be.
  • Angeles1son85
    Angeles1son85 Members Posts: 13,544 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    i.dont.mind.it.if family just not my ? uncle he be gettin mad tellin my son he.got.no.respect cuz.he.aint get him another.beer out the fridge.lol
  • REV_RAGE
    REV_RAGE Members Posts: 675 ✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2013
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    ^^^ Cosigned @Knock_Twice ^^^

    Yeah the teachers are more than welcome and capable of reaching the parent, who "SHOULD" know more than anyone what effectively disciplines their child. Children, or at least mine, responded to different punishments in separate ways. My son it was spanking, my 2 daughters time out, while the one daughter it was merely raising my voice.

    The only other adults allowed were the ones who disciplined me, anyone else has and would get a busted lip to start with.
  • Crude_
    Crude_ Members Posts: 19,964 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    7figz wrote: »
    I don't trust these ? to do it, people are too full of ? .

    That said, I expect my kids (that I raise) to have respect for adults so call'em out but leave the discipline to the parents.

    True but do you really discipline your child when he or she has been reported to you for misbehaving or nah?

    A lot of parents don't discipline their children at all, but then don't want you to touch them at school either.

    Rules are put in place to be followed and if they aren't their should be repercussions.

    When there is no threat of discipline for not following rules that's where anarchy rules.

    Kids are very smart they pick up situations such as this and act accordingly.

    Personally I don't agree with this sort of parenting but its the parents prerogative how they choose to discipline their kids.

    Just know if you don't discipline them early in life the White folks (? system) will discipline them later on in life.
  • Knock_Twice
    Knock_Twice Members Posts: 4,324 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2013
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    @Rage

    Don't know if you're black folk...but I see you used the 'timeout' method on your daughters...if you're black...does that work with black kids...I never in my life saw a black parent put a black kid in timeout lol...

    I remember being in Walmart on aisle 5 or some ? ...white lady and her son were on the same aisle and dude did something dumb..all I heard was "Token you're in timeout" and I look and dude is facing towards the shelves lol...and she, the mom is watching him while he's facing "towards the shelves" and my nosey ass stroll down to get a better view to see this ? ...I sholl strolled down that way and looked at her like she lost her dayum mind lol..smh
  • Chi Snow
    Chi Snow Guests, Members, Writer, Content Producer Posts: 28,111 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    Plus I'd have to see how they discipline they own child(ren)

    If they overly aggressive then I'm a have to nix that
  • 7figz
    7figz Members Posts: 15,294 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    7figz wrote: »
    I don't trust these ? to do it, people are too full of ? .

    That said, I expect my kids (that I raise) to have respect for adults so call'em out but leave the discipline to the parents.

    True but do you really discipline your child when he or she has been reported to you for misbehaving or nah?

    A lot of parents don't discipline their children at all, but then don't want you to touch them at school either.

    Rules are put in place to be followed and if they aren't their should be repercussions.

    When there is no threat of discipline for not following rules that's where anarchy rules.

    Kids are very smart they pick up situations such as this and act accordingly.

    Personally I don't agree with this sort of parenting but its the parents prerogative how they choose to discipline their kids.

    Just know if you don't discipline them early in life the White folks (? system) will discipline them later on in life.

    Yea I know about those motherfuckas who don't discipline their kids but ready to fight ery'body who got something to say.

    Unfortunately though, I can't trust people to instill their views on my kids. A lot of people be on too much ? .

    I'd discipline my kids, no doubt - except my kid doesn't live with me. I got that BM ? where she wanna call me when he does some negative ? and think I'm gonna come thru and kick ass.
  • Westie
    Westie Members Posts: 12,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I don't beat my kids, some of the most well behaved children you'll ever meet. Their family is free to put them in their place if need be, but don't touch them, we don't do that.

    I fully understand kids getting spanked though, just not what I choose to do.
  • Crude_
    Crude_ Members Posts: 19,964 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    I will add to this that a lot of Black folks don't correctly discipline their kids.

    In the past I've had little kids who can't write a complete sentence, but coming up to school with their pants hanging off their ass and using profanity with every other word.

    The parents don't want them disciplined, but when you report these behaviors to the parents their is no change in behavior.

    I came from an environment where my parents whipped my ass.

    They always instructed any adult they trusted to supervise me teachers included that they had the green light to whip my ass too.

    They also instructed those adults to let them know if they had to whip my ass, so I could get another ass whipping when I got home.

    Kids need discipline especially little Black boys I think some us raise these children without a structure of discipline at home but then turn around and wonder why they act the way they do when they get older.

    You already know as Black men we have a strike against us anyway but some of us are not preparing our kids for the culture of rules and laws they will encounter when they go into the real world.

    Then they get out here in the real world without adequate preparation and with attitudes for days and it give the White folks even more of a reason to single them out and pick on them about ? .

    Yea its not fair I agree, but some of our kids give themselves reasons to get fooled with.

    Your child is a reflection of you.
  • Crude_
    Crude_ Members Posts: 19,964 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    Westie wrote: »
    I don't beat my kids, some of the most well behaved children you'll ever meet. Their family is free to put them in their place if need be, but don't touch them, we don't do that.

    I fully understand kids getting spanked though, just not what I choose to do.

    I can agree with this every child doesn't need that hard edge discipline but some do.
  • Chi Snow
    Chi Snow Guests, Members, Writer, Content Producer Posts: 28,111 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2013
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    Not everything deserves an asswhooping tho

    There's level to discipline and if as an adult U don't understand that you can't discipline my child

  • Knock_Twice
    Knock_Twice Members Posts: 4,324 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2013
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    Like Judge Mathis states "tough love"

    I find that more and more of our black parents (women) tend to try and defend the kid's behavior more so...Like if the kid does something dumb at school or whereever, the mother will try her hardest to brush the kid's behavior off (she'll mention it somewhat to the kid, which goes in one ear and out the other ear) instead of checkin the kid about that dumb ? he or she has done and make it a learning lesson...She baby the kid more..and when it's a boy..that ? urks me the most...

    The boy done broke in houses and cars, but the mom states some dumb ? like...oh he has a problem or something stupid to cover up for the dude's acts instead of checking his ass..

  • Crude_
    Crude_ Members Posts: 19,964 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    Chicity wrote: »
    Not everything deserves an asswhooping tho

    There's level to discipline and if as an adult U don't understand tha,t you can't discipline my child

    I agree but repeated blatant disrespectful behavior to a supervising adult should be handled in a stern manner.

    Trust me I know kids will be kids, but cussing out and trying jump on teachers and so forth is uncalled for behavior.

    I've literally seen teachers get attacked by students and little ignorant parents run up to the school trying to justify this type of behavior instead of getting in their child's ass like they should.
  • Chi Snow
    Chi Snow Guests, Members, Writer, Content Producer Posts: 28,111 ✭✭✭✭✭
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  • REV_RAGE
    REV_RAGE Members Posts: 675 ✭✭✭✭
    edited October 2013
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    @Rage

    Don't know if you're black folk...but I see you used the 'timeout' method on your daughters...if you're black...does that work with black kids...I never in my life saw a black parent put a black kid in timeout lol...

    I remember being in Walmart on aisle 5 or some ? ...white lady and her son were on the same aisle and dude did something dumb..all I heard was "Token you're in timeout" and I look and dude is facing towards the shelves lol...and she, the mom is watching him while he's facing "towards the shelves" and my nosey ass stroll down to get a better view to see this ? ...I sholl strolled down that way and looked at her like she lost her dayum mind lol..smh

    I am white, it was more like solitary confinement the way I do it, ? that corner ? and sit in a chair ? . I went total correctional facility on they ? , bet that. Cleaned rooms of toys, tv and anything else I thought they get entertainment from. The windows only stayed open so they would be tortured by the fact they could see and hear the others play, and this ALWAYS was accompanied by an ass whooping I should had said that as well.

    My grand daughters are mixed black/white, they respond differently than their mother who is the only one just raising my voice to worked. She whoops they ? then time out as well, my other daughter don't even discipline my other grand kids at all yet they are white/Latino, grandpa tightens they ? up though.

    Glad to clarify that for you though. I was just basically agreeing that not every one punishment works the same on every child, it should be a case by case effort. I also condone composite/corporeal punishment, meaning an ass whooping with a time out or raising your tone. I am for what ever works for the child be they black, white, Latino, mixed or any other race and ethnicity.
  • Knock_Twice
    Knock_Twice Members Posts: 4,324 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    @Rage

    Don't know if you're black folk...but I see you used the 'timeout' method on your daughters...if you're black...does that work with black kids...I never in my life saw a black parent put a black kid in timeout lol...

    I remember being in Walmart on aisle 5 or some ? ...white lady and her son were on the same aisle and dude did something dumb..all I heard was "Token you're in timeout" and I look and dude is facing towards the shelves lol...and she, the mom is watching him while he's facing "towards the shelves" and my nosey ass stroll down to get a better view to see this ? ...I sholl strolled down that way and looked at her like she lost her dayum mind lol..smh

    I am white, it was more like solitary confinement the way I do it, ? that corner ? and sit in a chair ? . I went total correctional facility on they ? , bet that. Cleaned rooms of toys, tv and anything else I thought they get entertainment from. The windows only stayed open so they would be tortured by the fact they could see and hear the others play, and this ALWAYS was accompanied by an ass whooping I should had said that as well.

    My grand daughters are mixed black/white, they respond differently than their mother who is the only one just raising my voice to worked. She whoops they ? then time out as well, my other daughter don't even discipline my other grand kids at all yet they are white/Latino, grandpa tightens they ? up though.

    Glad to clarify that for you though. I was just basically agreeing that not every one punishment works the same on every child, it should be a case by case effort. I also condone composite/corporeal punishment, meaning an ass whooping with a time out or raising your tone. I am for what ever works for the child be they black, white, Latino, mixed or any other race and ethnicity.

    Much respect to you folk
  • mryounggun
    mryounggun Members Posts: 13,451 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    No problem with others disciplining my kid. As long as I approve of the methods and it's done respectfully. I don't have any older aunts or cousins or uncles or grandparents. Just my mom and my sister (who is basically the same age as me) and they know how to discipline my son without overstepping their boundaries. Then again, they live 3000 miles away and only visit once a year or so.

    Here's the REAL question: If you have a child and are no longer together with their mom or dad, how do you feel about their significant other disciplining your kid(s)?
  • babel
    babel Members Posts: 442 ✭✭✭
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    Chicity wrote: »
    Takes a village to raise a child is my motto

    U see mine acting up, correct them

    I agree I will elaborate more later.
    DNB1 wrote: »
    Chicity wrote: »
    Takes a village to raise a child is my motto

    U see mine acting up, correct them

    This...except teachers can get a bit to close for comfort...

    Teachers ain't ? , be on the IC all day arguing with Kat whilst the kids teach each other...smh

    This might be true but 9 times out of 10 those teachers such as myself you complain about spend more time with your child than you do.

    Sure there are some bad apples in the bunch like any other profession but you're incredibly foolish if you think all teachers are rotten or are lying about your child.

    Seeing as though the teacher probably spends more or almost as much time with your child as you and are responsible for educating your child I don't see the issue in teachers disciplining your child.

    When you can't discipline students you create a culture of students who don't want to follow rules then you come up to the school and wonder why your child isn't academically where he or she should be.

    Cosign to the fullest as a fellow teacher! I use all three methods with my son. I'm cool with family using all three when necessary also. I'm cool with teachers using timeouts and fine sort of grounding but no physical stuff. We have a list generation because nobody wants their child disciplined anymore.
  • emrulz
    emrulz Members Posts: 133 ✭✭✭
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    I'm ok with select family members disciplining my children but you have to know them, know their tendencies, know how to get thru to them. That knocks it down to a few select people but they are the ones that my kids know and my kids will respond to. If you've never spent time around my kids, you need to fall back.

    Teachers get freedom to a point because I can't be certain that it's not just that the teacher is just fussed in general and using my child as an outlet. While understandable, some teachers can just be some cranky ? .

    Definitely believe in "it takes a village" but not all of ya live in my village
  • Dirty Sanchez
    Dirty Sanchez Members Posts: 15,479 ✭✭✭✭✭
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    my son is an ?