Is it ok to do things with just YOUR child in a blended relationship?
Options
babel
Members Posts: 442 ✭✭✭
Long story short: My son is 5 and my girl's son is 3. My son is experiencing the effects of his parents divorcing and his mother taking him with her out of spite. He needs extra undivided attention from me during this time but my girl feels like it's unfair to HER son to just take my son places occasionally.
Comments
-
Man ? that, she cant control what you do with yo son
-
You should always do what's best for your child
If he needs some individual attention... Then give it to him.
Considering the circumstances .... Your girl should be more understanding -
Do what you need to do with your seed man. Your girl just gonna have to deal with it
-
Leave that ? now
-
man your girl's son aint yours b.....focus on your boy, tell if she dont understand she dont need to be w u..
-
MsSouthern wrote: »You should always do what's best for your child
If he needs some individual attention... Then give it to him.
Considering the circumstances .... Your girl should be more understanding
There it is.
I could see it if you NEVER included her kid like he didn't exist or if your son wasn't being effected by the divorce and you were excluding him your girl's son just because...but neither of those are the case.
She's doing too much, my ? . What she say when you explain the ? to her? -
Step 1: don't date baby mamas!!
Step 2: see step 1
Step 3: see step 2 -
I agree with ppl saying your girl should be understanding. She can come up with ways that interest her son in the mean time and keep him pre-occupied,while u deal with your son. Children should be involved in different activities anyways with occasional bonding time here and there. Plus her son is only 3, he is too young to notice unless she is not doing anything with him. 3 year olds and 5 year olds are at different developmental stages. They don't need to be doing same things. Just my 2 cents. I spent too much time with kids smh
-
I don't have any kids so forgive me for talking out of place... but FDB man... I don't mean no disrespect but she all around tripping for real... is this her first bout of jealousy?? Cause if that ain't a deadass sign to cut bruh...
-
Thank ? I'm dumb enough to fall into that abyss.
Having to make all the different family holiday events would be a ? nightmare in a blended family.
The second I have a kid, *boom* i'm blowing my brains out. -
If you just in the living room on the ps4 telling lil man he can't sit with y'all and get a run you a ? ? tho. Always two sides.
Jokes aside if you serious about this chick long term it might not hurt to have them around each other some either and let them form a bond as well. Show both them lil ? how to be a man. -
Even in a relationship where both children are from the same parents sometimes you may need to devote more attention to one than the other if something is going on. If she can't get that basic concept then that's a red flag you want to address now and not 2-3 years down the line
-
sounds like a tough spot.
-
U should take a ? on her face
-
yes with in reason and it sounds like he needs some extra attention due to the tough situation. Nothing wrong with that you may wanna check if your girl is built for this. I have 2 kids from previous marriage and 2 with my current wife and there are times where she does stuff for "hers" it's not a problem its needed and is actually healthy.
As long as she don't do no crazy ? like take her's to Disney Land or something like that. -
You should just leave her.
-
you should show each child their own attention
each can have their own time with you and her
but to go out your way to just spend time with just your child.....you are not fully in the blended relationship -
Long story short: My son is 5 and my girl's son is 3. My son is experiencing the effects of his parents divorcing and his mother taking him with her out of spite. He needs extra undivided attention from me during this time but my girl feels like it's unfair to HER son to just take my son places occasionally.
-
Even in a relationship where both children are from the same parents sometimes you may need to devote more attention to one than the other if something is going on. If she can't get that basic concept then that's a red flag you want to address now and not 2-3 years down the line
This. It's really important to spend time alone with children individually. They each need to feel important, that's something your girlfriend needs to learn. She sounds a little immature. -
I agree with Blackrain and Westie
the thing is, there is NOTHING wrong with spending individual time with each of them
it allows them to establish trust, relationship bonds, and memories that will probably be more special to them as they grow up and look back on life and pinpoint the exact moment where something happened with just the two of you
this doesnt mean you treat them differently b/c of their gender, i.e. only doing things with the son that are generally associated with boys and vice versa, but you try things out with them and see what they like. The girl might actually like sports and stuff.
But might be time to sit her down and have a talk -
even if u had two kids that were ur biologically and one was goin thru somethin and needed his father's undivided then guess what u better do..
-
Clearly you got ya hands full TS
Depending on her cup size I might be willing to help relieve you of her -
What y'all live together already while u still not divorced
Yeah ex wife salty -
You need to kick this ? to the curb. She should be more understanding to your situation. It ain't your fault her baby daddy is a dead beat...side note ain't no ? taking my seed away from me for spite.
-
MrSoutCity wrote: »You need to kick this ? to the curb. She should be more understanding to your situation. It ain't your fault her baby daddy is a dead beat...side note ain't no ? taking my seed away from me for spite.
Word. Overtime I read some ? like that I be at a loss and be wanting to ask questions but I just fall back.
