Pros / Cons About Marriage
Options
Comments
-
i mean, past the pros and cons, first people should realize marriage aint for everybody.
marriage, just like anything else, has to be done right.
you got a good job and a 401k, and you marrying a ? that doesnt even work? you done ? up from the get go.
marry someone on your level. you a professional making x amount of dollars? marry a chick who is a proffesional and makes money in the same range.
marry someone who believes the same thing you do, you religious? make sure she is too. you family oriented? make sure she is too.
whatever your level of maturity is, make sure the person you are marrying is there too. you more mature then her and yall both bout to get married? you ? up.
you cant find the person to meet this criteria? well ? it, wait till you do. who the ? gets married just to get married?
follow these simple rules and there is a high chance your marriage will be one that works out.
Real facts right here. My homie had the perfect marriage on paper they both make good bread have 2 beautiful lil ones and wife came home one day and said she doesn't believe in marriage anymore SMH blew my mind how that could happen cause they got along great. Point is I believe the mental maturity was off with one of them
I mean any marriage can end, regardless of right it was.
To me the idea is to try to limit risk. Life is all about risk management, marriage aint different.
Another thing people should do is wait till they are at a minimum 28+ to marry. At that point a person knows if they are marriage material or not.
Some people are just not marriage material. -
i mean, past the pros and cons, first people should realize marriage aint for everybody.
marriage, just like anything else, has to be done right.
you got a good job and a 401k, and you marrying a ? that doesnt even work? you done ? up from the get go.
marry someone on your level. you a professional making x amount of dollars? marry a chick who is a proffesional and makes money in the same range.
marry someone who believes the same thing you do, you religious? make sure she is too. you family oriented? make sure she is too.
whatever your level of maturity is, make sure the person you are marrying is there too. you more mature then her and yall both bout to get married? you ? up.
you cant find the person to meet this criteria? well ? it, wait till you do. who the ? gets married just to get married?
follow these simple rules and there is a high chance your marriage will be one that works out.
Real facts right here. My homie had the perfect marriage on paper they both make good bread have 2 beautiful lil ones and wife came home one day and said she doesn't believe in marriage anymore SMH blew my mind how that could happen cause they got along great. Point is I believe the mental maturity was off with one of them
I mean any marriage can end, regardless of right it was.
To me the idea is to try to limit risk. Life is all about risk management, marriage aint different.
Another thing people should do is wait till they are at a minimum 28+ to marry. At that point a person knows if they are marriage material or not.
Some people are just not marriage material.
crazy how many women think they are -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »i mean, past the pros and cons, first people should realize marriage aint for everybody.
marriage, just like anything else, has to be done right.
you got a good job and a 401k, and you marrying a ? that doesnt even work? you done ? up from the get go.
marry someone on your level. you a professional making x amount of dollars? marry a chick who is a proffesional and makes money in the same range.
marry someone who believes the same thing you do, you religious? make sure she is too. you family oriented? make sure she is too.
whatever your level of maturity is, make sure the person you are marrying is there too. you more mature then her and yall both bout to get married? you ? up.
you cant find the person to meet this criteria? well ? it, wait till you do. who the ? gets married just to get married?
follow these simple rules and there is a high chance your marriage will be one that works out.
Real facts right here. My homie had the perfect marriage on paper they both make good bread have 2 beautiful lil ones and wife came home one day and said she doesn't believe in marriage anymore SMH blew my mind how that could happen cause they got along great. Point is I believe the mental maturity was off with one of them
I mean any marriage can end, regardless of right it was.
To me the idea is to try to limit risk. Life is all about risk management, marriage aint different.
Another thing people should do is wait till they are at a minimum 28+ to marry. At that point a person knows if they are marriage material or not.
Some people are just not marriage material.
crazy how many women think they are
It takes two to tango.
Plenty of men think they marriage material too.
Then you see situations where both partners are marriage material, but one of the two arent parent material.
Im neither one man. Maybe one day, but as of now, no marriage for me, and definetely no kids. -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »i mean, past the pros and cons, first people should realize marriage aint for everybody.
marriage, just like anything else, has to be done right.
you got a good job and a 401k, and you marrying a ? that doesnt even work? you done ? up from the get go.
marry someone on your level. you a professional making x amount of dollars? marry a chick who is a proffesional and makes money in the same range.
marry someone who believes the same thing you do, you religious? make sure she is too. you family oriented? make sure she is too.
whatever your level of maturity is, make sure the person you are marrying is there too. you more mature then her and yall both bout to get married? you ? up.
you cant find the person to meet this criteria? well ? it, wait till you do. who the ? gets married just to get married?
follow these simple rules and there is a high chance your marriage will be one that works out.
Real facts right here. My homie had the perfect marriage on paper they both make good bread have 2 beautiful lil ones and wife came home one day and said she doesn't believe in marriage anymore SMH blew my mind how that could happen cause they got along great. Point is I believe the mental maturity was off with one of them
I mean any marriage can end, regardless of right it was.
To me the idea is to try to limit risk. Life is all about risk management, marriage aint different.
Another thing people should do is wait till they are at a minimum 28+ to marry. At that point a person knows if they are marriage material or not.
Some people are just not marriage material.
crazy how many women think they are
It takes two to tango.
Plenty of men think they marriage material too.
Then you see situations where both partners are marriage material, but one of the two arent parent material.
Im neither one man. Maybe one day, but as of now, no marriage for me, and definetely no kids.
I'm not sure dudes think they are marraige material....more like a catch cuz they think they thorough.
-
Shizlansky wrote: »I'm getting married in two months and be with my lady for 6 years.
Can't wait. We on the same page and got the same goals.
I know he cons but also know the pros.
Yea it's cool now. Once you say "i do" and sign that contact. She owns your whole ass and then some. -
Pros ?
In-house ? sex partner.
In-house cook person to share household duties.
Not living in sin - if you're the religious type. -
If you are lookin at it form that angle then one of these things maybe true
You aint ready
You are getting married for the wrong reasons
Your/your partner aint ? ..
-
Cons ?
Having to split anything purchased during the marriage 50/50 no matter who purchased it and with whose money (in the event of divorce).
Having to pay spousal support / alimony.
Getting tired of the same sex partner. -
I don't see how marriage does anything different in child rearing. Obviously single parent homes yes but if the couple stayed together but were never married I don't think it has any bearing on how the kids turn out. And since the gov here said its common law after like a year? I really don't see the point. Except* maybe to have a big fancy expensive party.
-
Most ? think a marriage is going smooth till it ain't. Ya ? will know months in advance she about to divorce you.
She'll be making preparations seeing lawyers coaching the kids. Letting her friends know. Everybody will know but you.
When will you know? At the job, some random ? walks up to your desk, "hey you so n so?" you, quizzical than a ? , but cautious ready to throw hands. Yea that's me.
"? you been served"
You look at the papers it say you can't go back to the crib. You call your wife she don't answer. You go to the house anyway there's either a sheriff there already or she changed the locks. Kids at grandma's.
You gotta call the ? see if you can crash on his couch. You go to the store pick up a six pack. You get in line "PAYMENT DECLINED" that ? either cleaned out y'all joint bank account or got an injunction put on that ? . Either way you broke.
Y'all think it's a game if you want. -
Im sure one reason my ex called off our wedding and engagement was cause I told her we could have the wedding, and everyone could think differently, but im not signing no papers.
Haha, at first she was cool with it, but as it got closer it started to bother her a lot. -
i mean, past the pros and cons, first people should realize marriage aint for everybody.
marriage, just like anything else, has to be done right.
you got a good job and a 401k, and you marrying a ? that doesnt even work? you done ? up from the get go.
marry someone on your level. you a professional making x amount of dollars? marry a chick who is a proffesional and makes money in the same range.
marry someone who believes the same thing you do, you religious? make sure she is too. you family oriented? make sure she is too.
whatever your level of maturity is, make sure the person you are marrying is there too. you more mature then her and yall both bout to get married? you ? up.
you cant find the person to meet this criteria? well ? it, wait till you do. who the ? gets married just to get married?
follow these simple rules and there is a high chance your marriage will be one that works out.
Real facts right here. My homie had the perfect marriage on paper they both make good bread have 2 beautiful lil ones and wife came home one day and said she doesn't believe in marriage anymore SMH blew my mind how that could happen cause they got along great. Point is I believe the mental maturity was off with one of them
She said she doesnt believe in marriage but I bet she believes in spousal support. -
Most ? think a marriage is going smooth till it ain't. Ya ? will know months in advance she about to divorce you.
She'll be making preparations seeing lawyers coaching the kids. Letting her friends know. Everybody will know but you.
When will you know? At the job, some random ? walks up to your desk, "hey you so n so?" you, quizzical than a ? , but cautious ready to throw hands. Yea that's me.
"? you been served"
You look at the papers it say you can't go back to the crib. You call your wife she don't answer. You go to the house anyway there's either a sheriff there already or she changed the locks. Kids at grandma's.
You gotta call the ? see if you can crash on his couch. You go to the store pick up a six pack. You get in line "PAYMENT DECLINED" that ? either cleaned out y'all joint bank account or got an injunction put on that ? . Either way you broke.
Y'all think it's a game if you want.
Lol damn ? -
-
Pro:???
Con: a ? can divorce you for no reason kick you out your own home, deny you access to your kids, move her new bf or gf into the crib that you're still paying for, and you have to pay alimony and child support while paying for rent ina one bdrm or studio apt.
True.
Back in the day marriage favored men..........now it favors women.
No-Fault divorce changed the game. -
Pro:???
Con: a ? can divorce you for no reason kick you out your own home, deny you access to your kids, move her new bf or gf into the crib that you're still paying for, and you have to pay alimony and child support while paying for rent ina one bdrm or studio apt.
True.
Back in the day marriage favored men..........now it favors women.
No-Fault divorce changed the game.
Back in the day a ? had to act right. Well white ? . Black ? ain't never had to act right. -
i mean, past the pros and cons, first people should realize marriage aint for everybody.
marriage, just like anything else, has to be done right.
you got a good job and a 401k, and you marrying a ? that doesnt even work? you done ? up from the get go.
marry someone on your level. you a professional making x amount of dollars? marry a chick who is a proffesional and makes money in the same range.
marry someone who believes the same thing you do, you religious? make sure she is too. you family oriented? make sure she is too.
whatever your level of maturity is, make sure the person you are marrying is there too. you more mature then her and yall both bout to get married? you ? up.
you cant find the person to meet this criteria? well ? it, wait till you do. who the ? gets married just to get married?
follow these simple rules and there is a high chance your marriage will be one that works out.
Real facts right here. My homie had the perfect marriage on paper they both make good bread have 2 beautiful lil ones and wife came home one day and said she doesn't believe in marriage anymore SMH blew my mind how that could happen cause they got along great. Point is I believe the mental maturity was off with one of them
Lunch ? must've gotten to her. -
Most ? think a marriage is going smooth till it ain't. Ya ? will know months in advance she about to divorce you.
She'll be making preparations seeing lawyers coaching the kids. Letting her friends know. Everybody will know but you.
When will you know? At the job, some random ? walks up to your desk, "hey you so n so?" you, quizzical than a ? , but cautious ready to throw hands. Yea that's me.
"? you been served"
You look at the papers it say you can't go back to the crib. You call your wife she don't answer. You go to the house anyway there's either a sheriff there already or she changed the locks. Kids at grandma's.
You gotta call the ? see if you can crash on his couch. You go to the store pick up a six pack. You get in line "PAYMENT DECLINED" that ? either cleaned out y'all joint bank account or got an injunction put on that ? . Either way you broke.
Y'all think it's a game if you want.
-
Most ? think a marriage is going smooth till it ain't. Ya ? will know months in advance she about to divorce you.
She'll be making preparations seeing lawyers coaching the kids. Letting her friends know. Everybody will know but you.
When will you know? At the job, some random ? walks up to your desk, "hey you so n so?" you, quizzical than a ? , but cautious ready to throw hands. Yea that's me.
"? you been served"
You look at the papers it say you can't go back to the crib. You call your wife she don't answer. You go to the house anyway there's either a sheriff there already or she changed the locks. Kids at grandma's.
You gotta call the ? see if you can crash on his couch. You go to the store pick up a six pack. You get in line "PAYMENT DECLINED" that ? either cleaned out y'all joint bank account or got an injunction put on that ? . Either way you broke.
Y'all think it's a game if you want.
That's some etherous ? right there. -
Seen it from both sides. Sometimes when U'r in a neutral zone ( not married) people open up about their struggles and happiness as well. Pro: It will or should calm you down and centralize ya focus. Play time should be over by now. Cons: Trust. Not in a fedility aspect but, trust that when you say you'll handle something u do it. Bills, commitment that does not revolve around U etc and Score keeping.We a team baby not competitors. That's the gist of what I get when one of the homies need to get out for a drink wifey on their nerves.
-
Seen it from both sides. Sometimes when U'r in a neutral zone ( not married) people open up about their struggles and happiness as well. Pro: It will or should calm you down and centralize ya focus. Play time should be over by now. Cons: Trust. Not in a fedility aspect but, trust that when you say you'll handle something u do it. Bills, commitment that does not revolve around U etc and Score keeping.We a team baby not competitors. That's the gist of what I get when one of the homies need to get out for a drink wifey on their nerves.
that's something I had to work thru....
our score keeping an competitive nature caused many fights but also pushed us to great heights.
we actually got together over a "you aint ? , I'm better than you" weird way. long story.
but we now are a superteam...cause we learned to work together.
fukk the warriors, bulls and patriots. it's Mr an Mrs pralims in this ? -
BiblicalAtheist wrote: »I don't see how marriage does anything different in child rearing. Obviously single parent homes yes but if the couple stayed together but were never married I don't think it has any bearing on how the kids turn out. And since the gov here said its common law after like a year? I really don't see the point. Except* maybe to have a big fancy expensive party.
Ideally I want to believe this. If 2 people ain't ? as parents, they won't be ? as married parents.
On the flip-side, I believe 2 good parents, even if separated can still be 2 good parents, but I think family court and child support laws mess that up. So in practice, I think it may most likely turn out to be worse when people separate. -
@2stepz_ahead ...Be honest fam and ya post was dope, cosigned U. Any1 else can answer too. Do U open ALL the way up tho with ya wife? Not necessarily keeping secrets but share it all since it is till death do you both part. I'd still feel it as a " Boyfriend / Girlfriend" relationship with kids, house and responsibilities therefore be open and honest still but I'd say fully open with her about 60% only.
-
Ayo which one a yall married with reservations in your heart and which one of yall ddnt see the red flags? Lets talk about it
-
Props, lots of science being dropped. I'm not married, and I'm still on the fence, which is annoying because you know moms (and all her friends) gotta be stressing a ? , especially since I'm the only son.
Imo, there's an infinite number of good reasons for a man to not get married, and really, there's only one good reason to get married, so the odds don't exactly look good. But something tells me marriage can be the worst thing or the greatest thing, with far in few between. But I've seen the latter in my own parents, grandparents, and friends.
But my old folks had it much "easier." Marriage seems to work rarer nowadays for various reasons. I have to agree with deadeye. No-fault divorce ? up the game. But I'll go further. The government ? up marriage (as it's apt to do with whatever it gets into). Instead of pushing so hard to get the government to grant permission for ? to get married, we should've pushed hard to get the government out of marriage altogether and have people decide their marriages themselves via personal contracts that would be merely protected by the government.
You ? better be careful though. Like I've said a million times, prenups can be dismissed in court. And if you're unmarried but live with a partner for a certain amount of time, you can legally be considered married by the government in certain situations. Or so I've heard.Shizlansky wrote: »I'm getting married in two months and be with my lady for 6 years.
Can't wait. We on the same page and got the same goals.
I know he cons but also know the pros.
Congrats, but be careful...
