Hilarious NBA Stories
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Jdilla26
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The 1st one is John Salley off of Deadspin trlling when he was in the expansion draft for Toronto Raptors.
http://deadspin.com/5659426/john-salley-story-corner-down-and-out-in-toronto-with-isiah-thomas-and-crazy-alvin-robertson?skyline=true&s=i
A Charles Oakley Story
http://deadspin.com/5659426/john-salley-story-corner-down-and-out-in-toronto-with-isiah-thomas-and-crazy-alvin-robertson?skyline=true&s=i
Now, if you don't know, I was on the Toronto Raptors their first year, 1995-96. Isiah Thomas was the owner. B.J. Armstrong and I were all in the expansion draft. I had to leave Miami, which I didn't really want to do, even though at the time the ? general manager—you can look it up—was busting my ass, never mind that I played hurt all year because of Rony Seikaly's injury.
Anyway, I go to the Raptors and I'm sitting there and it's a big day for some reason. Isiah takes me and B.J. Armstrong in a car, and I think we're going to the airport. No, it's a party. This schmooze thing at, like, 6:30 p.m. at a beautiful place in Toronto.
So, we open the door, and Isiah asks B.J. what he thinks. Now, B.J. and Isiah are both from Chicago, got the same tone, and B.J. says: "Thanks, I appreciate it, Zeke, but you gotta get me outta here. I can't play here." So he works a deal and gets rid of B.J.
So, Isiah goes to to me, "Hey, Sal, what are you thinking?"
I'm like, B.J. knows something I don't know. I need to get out of here, too. So I tell him, "Hey, if you can hook it up, I'd love to leave."
But Zeke is like, "Well, there's three things with that. Orlando wants to give me Anthony Avent and this other white player [Brooks Thompson or Jeff Turner]. I'm not doing that."
And I'm thinking, "C'mon, I wanna play with Shaq and Penny! I won't even play, just get a check and sit in the sun. C'mon, man."
And he tells me: "Chicago wants to give you a gig, but they've got Dennis Rodman and James Edwards. And you know Detroit wants you back, but you know I'm not negotiating with them. Listen. This is going to be a great place for you."
I'm looking at him like, please, please, ? , let me go. And he doesn't trade me. He's got three offers for me, and he still won't trade me.
But he says that Toronto's going to be a spot. That I'll be able to own the town. I buy into it.
I had no idea what I was getting into. Every day in the newspaper was a full page explaining a referee's call. They had to explain basketball to these people.
The team was full of these characters, too. There was Carlos Rogers, Oliver Miller—people forget because of the weight thing, but the Big O could play—and Alvin Robertson. Alvin Robertson was the scariest player I ever played against. He would beat the ? out of anybody. If you told me to put together a team of all the old-timers, it would be Alvin Robertson and Sidney Moncrief—just tough dudes.
Now, Alvin Robertson gets arrested the night before our first game for kicking a naked prostitute out of his hotel room after deciding he didn't want to pay. He gets bailed out the next day at like 3 in the afternoon and our game is at 7. He goes out and leads the team in scoring and we win the first game. That's when I knew that season was going to be weird.
[Ed. note: It seems our storyteller has taken a bit of poetic license. Robertson was arrested on an assault charge Oct. 28, 1995, after what media reports described as an "incident" with an unidentified Toronto woman. In the Raptors' first game that season, on Nov. 3, Robertson led the team with 30 points, and Toronto defeated New Jersey, 94-79.]
A Charles Oakley Story
Charles Oakley was dating a woman in Charlotte, NC. He called the woman’s house and LA Clipper Jeff McInnis was there. Oakley went hunting for Jeff that night, but couldn’t find him. So, the next time their two teams played, Oakley walked up to McInnis on the bench and punched him in the head before the game. Oakley blamed one of McInnis’ coaches at the time, Alvin Gentry, for telling reporters the story.
Comments
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Oak was a G lol
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Oakley got plenty of stories especially extorting Tyrone Hill for that one season b/c Hill owed moneyCharles Oakley and Tyrone Hill were both kicked out of a 2000 preseason game when Oakley slapped Hill in the mouth during warmups,
It turns out Hill owed Oakley $54,000 from a dice game and was slow to pay up.
Later that same season, Oakley was suspended again after throwing a basketball at Hill face during a shootaround. Hill eventually settled up, but because of his "coward move," Oakley insisted that he pay double. -
anymore stories?
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Well dont ? with Oakley ? & his money. That's the NBA in the 90's you do that ? now is all in the news and your getting fine
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? hilarious
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Man if i owe Oakley money , id definitely pay him ...i saw him workout at the gym last yr and he was no joke
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CSN Bay Area's Matt Steinmetz:IamtheVILLE wrote: »anymore stories?After the team’s noon practice, Nelson took rookie Stephen Curry, second-year shooting guard Anthony Morrow, D-League signee Anthony Tolliver and a couple coaches to Smitty’s -- a downtown Oakland bar -- for some quality time and shuffleboard.
When Nelson was asked about his “bonding session” with the players the following day, he seemed a little taken aback.
“You’re not supposed to know about that,” Nelson said.
When Nelson was told that both Morrow and Curry posted about the day’s activities on Twitter, he was a little more forthcoming.
“Actually, I was out of money and I needed some cash so I took the young guys out and shot a little shuffleboard with them in the afternoon,” Nelson said. “And took their money.”
Thursday wasn’t the first time Nelson has taken players out to play some shuffleboard to Smitty’s … a couple of years ago he corralled Baron Davis and Stephen Jackson and ventured to the Grand Avenue gathering spot for an afternoon session.
Oh that Don Nelson, what a hustler. -
Posted this one in another thread alreadyAlvin Gentry: “After a game against Utah Stackhouse tells Kirk Snyder, “I’m going to kick your ass,” but the kid doesn’t think anything about it. Game’s over, Stackhouse, who dresses all GQ, goes to the equipment manager and asks for a warm-up suit, puts that on, goes out into the tunnel, sees Snyder, kicks his ass with a couple of punches, goes back into the locker room, returns the warm-up and puts on a nice blue suit. All in a day’s work”
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lmfao @ those stories in da O/P dis thread could be hilarious if people dig enough on da internet ima be back in dis thread later
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when larry johnson played in charlotte he had a huge house on lake wylie. everyone knew which house was his cause you could see it from one of the main roads. so one day a few of us thought it would be cool if we actually went to his house. we were all young so someone's ? parents drive us and parks across the street, we walk up a little ways and notice the garage door is up and then we see that mug doing ? bench presses in his garage like a g. we walked back to the car and went home talking about how dumb of an idea it was
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You didnt call him a ? and run or something?? That ? was boring as ?
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he may as well have called us all ?
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Only stories i can remember was that theory that the refs were trying to fix game 6 of the 2002 NBA Western Conference Finals
Or that time where Mutombo got ? in Georgetown and hollered "Who wants to sex Mutombo?"
Rumor still has it that Wilt Chamberlain slept with 20.000 women. If that holds up, then John Holmes hadn't got ish on the big dipper
The most smh one i can recall reading about, was the one about Delonte West seeing Lebrons mom!
I recently saw all of those on bleacherreport. So i guess they're still doing the rounds -
CSN Bay Area's Matt Steinmetz:IamtheVILLE wrote: »anymore stories?After the team’s noon practice, Nelson took rookie Stephen Curry, second-year shooting guard Anthony Morrow, D-League signee Anthony Tolliver and a couple coaches to Smitty’s -- a downtown Oakland bar -- for some quality time and shuffleboard.
When Nelson was asked about his “bonding session” with the players the following day, he seemed a little taken aback.
“You’re not supposed to know about that,” Nelson said.
When Nelson was told that both Morrow and Curry posted about the day’s activities on Twitter, he was a little more forthcoming.
“Actually, I was out of money and I needed some cash so I took the young guys out and shot a little shuffleboard with them in the afternoon,” Nelson said. “And took their money.”
Thursday wasn’t the first time Nelson has taken players out to play some shuffleboard to Smitty’s … a couple of years ago he corralled Baron Davis and Stephen Jackson and ventured to the Grand Avenue gathering spot for an afternoon session.
Oh that Don Nelson, what a hustler.
Don Nelson always reminded me of a barfly get ? as ? type of a coach anyways even before I heard about his drinking past ? just looked like some nick nolte type of dirtbag guy who happens to coach basketball lol -
"Play some Picasso to me...." Former Nets player Chris Morris said it to pianist while in the bar trying to impress a chick. -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=9thi8tBbC6Q
Gilbert Arenas explaining why he took a ? in Andray Blatche's shoes lol -
so oakley smacked up a ? over a jumpoff....i could understand if its your wife or fiance, but that's a L b....
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ShadyWorldOrder wrote: »Oakley got plenty of stories especially extorting Tyrone Hill for that one season b/c Hill owed moneyCharles Oakley and Tyrone Hill were both kicked out of a 2000 preseason game when Oakley slapped Hill in the mouth during warmups,
It turns out Hill owed Oakley $54,000 from a dice game and was slow to pay up.
Later that same season, Oakley was suspended again after throwing a basketball at Hill face during a shootaround. Hill eventually settled up, but because of his "coward move," Oakley insisted that he pay double.
trill ? -
oakley probably extorting mike too; since we know mike don't like paying his debts to ?
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Elzo69Revolutions wrote: »Man if i owe Oakley money , id definitely pay him ...i saw him workout at the gym last yr and he was no joke
oakley: "you owe me money, ? ?"
me: "hell nah, but here you go..." (passes my wallet)
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Inglewood_B wrote: »Elzo69Revolutions wrote: »Man if i owe Oakley money , id definitely pay him ...i saw him workout at the gym last yr and he was no joke
oakley: "you owe me money, ? ?"
me: "hell nah, but here you go..." (passes my wallet)
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ALLEN IVERSON VS. JERRY STACKHOUSE
I very nearly put Manu Ginobili in this spot after watching video of Stackhouse choke slam him and then pin his head to the floor during a Dallas and San Antonio matchup. But the now 37-year-old didn’t discriminate when it came to handing out ass whoopings. He can lay hands on a foreign player, or he might just go after a teammate in practice.
Back when Iverson and Stack were two young guns in Philly, there were all sorts of rumors flying around that they didn’t get along. Some of it seemed true; others were just fabrications. But one disagreement definitely happened.
During a morning shootaround in March of 1997, the two stars came to blows. One source told The New York Daily News Stackhouse started it by punching Iverson in the head.
Both guys downplayed it later, and said they were cool with each other. But Stackhouse did drop this: “It was a fight between one guy who doesn’t know how to fight and another guy who didn’t want to.”
Later that day, Stackhouse would shoot 3-for-14 in a loss to the Knicks, so maybe it did have an effect on him.
http://dimemag.com/2012/08/the-top-5-times-jerry-stackhouse-beat-down-a-nba-player/ -
WOLVES PLAYER WATCHED PORN, CAUSED CRASH
(WCCO) Minneapolis – On March 30, Minnesota Timberwolves center Eddie Griffin* was ? and ? when he crashed his luxury SUV into a parked Suburban outside a store in Minneapolis, according to a lawsuit filed Thursday by the man whose Suburban was hit in the crash.The WCCO-TV I-TEAM obtained copies of 911 calls and store surveillance video of the incident, along with an accident report the police submitted to the state.
Several of the 911 callers that night said Griffin was ? . One witness said Griffin told him he was watching pornography in a DVD player mounted on the dashboard of his Cadillac Escalade SUV when he struck a Chevy Suburban parked on University Avenue Southeast. The location where Griffin crashed is located a couple miles from the Target Center where Griffin had played with his team several hours earlier. -
Damn Stackhouse don't play
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Now i see why Michael Jordan keeps Oak around lol
