Fellas and Women in a relationship, need some real help
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I didn't think to even ask how old you were @silverfoxx ? Do you think that you are mentally mature enough to deal w/ compromising/sacrificing your personal needs for this woman? Will she or would she do the same for you?
Real ? I feel I am, and I want to compromise and Sacrifice. More then anything me and her both are learning alot that goes beyond sex and physicality in this relationship. We both are becoming better individuals and learning life together. So I'm definitely committed to making this ? work.
I've met sooooo many bird ass women in my young life it's actually refreshing to be with someone who generally challenges me to better myself, and I do the same with her. She a rider, and loyal AF, and holds me down crazy heavy which is hard as hell to find in a jaded and materialistic place like ATL. So for that alone, I'm willing to man up and put the work in. -
silverfoxx wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »^^^just know....
a woman can have a higher sex drive and make you just want to be held and not sexed all the time.
? in here lying or aint been around enough.
i had a chick..i had to tap out and try to keep her ass busy with other ? ....chick drained me dehydrated to the point i needed eye drops just to blink
That's the thing, I've dated chicks in the past that done the same thing to me, but I didn't love them or could see myself with them. So with my girl now I'm at least willing to compromise just to see where this ? goes first before I press the panic button and blow it up. She told me how she felt, said she wanted normacy and didn't wanna feel like everything is a sexual expectation. I never noticed I made her feel that way, but now I do I'll work around it or like I said just not show any sexual desire until she wants to make love with me. If that don't work, THEN I'll consider truly looking at the relationship fabric.
Good ass will make you miss alot of things....lol
but she gave an honest reason and sounds like she doesnt want her ? abused to the point its no longer usable or enjoyable.
makes sense.
no one wants they ? lips looking like a cheesesteak.
just look a it like...at least she was honest and you know she has school.
encourage her schooling and continue the courtship. -
i'm proud this didnt turn into a troll thread
ya'll growing up IC
salute
#nobawse -
atribecalledgabi wrote: »silverfoxx wrote: »atribecalledgabi wrote: »@silverfoxx is your gf on birth control? If so that could be a reason why her sex drive took a dip.
Yes she is, also she heavy into school so like I said, maybe it's me tripping and not being understanding, I'll try to be a understanding partner. Already accepted that fact that I'm probably not going to get physical for like a month or two. I'll just let her be the aggressor .
Do you know how long she been on bc? Also does she take other meds? The mix of bc with other scripts + the stress of school....and on top of that her diet might be trash too (or just different than when y'all first got together) due to the environment....it all might just be hormonal at the end of the day. Nothing to do with you.
She actually warned me of this before. I honestly should have caught the signs. And yes her diet is very inconsistent and she takes bc and some other ? . I'll try to find out . -
silverfoxx wrote: »SMH @ my self ether. My personal life (? I don't want people to care about) is getting more views and responses then my music artisic threads(? I only want people to care about)
I gotta start fooling and finessing the IC on some Nigerian scam ? huh? Lol
misery loves company bruh.
exposure bringing the boys to the yard. lol
but when you trying to do something positive.....take that ? elsewhere...smdh.
? gonna nig -
EmM HoLLa. wrote: »EmM HoLLa. wrote: »EmM HoLLa. wrote: »I love all these old and married ? in the thread talking bout they'd be out or cheat. Like none of y'all have had a woman not want to ? as much. I expect it from young ? but either the vast majority of you are complete trash (I haven't ruled that out) or you're fronting like a mfker.
With age comes experience.. If you're dealing with someone and you aren't compatible in certain areas.. Especially sexually.. The relationship is going no where fast.. You can overlook it all you want.. But there will come a time when that thing you overlooked to start a relationship is the very thing that will break a relationship.. Some of the older cats on the board have been there and done that.. This isn't rocket science.. But I digress...
As long as your experience from jumping from relationship to relationship, and sticking your ? into the 1st thing with open legs has made you happy, and you have never ? over a good woman in the process cool. Cuz ? talking and compromise, your ? tho.
Yeah pretty much.. Only thing I would clarify is the advice I am giving isn't just aimed at sex.. That's just in general.. Life is too short to settle.. In any area of life. You can try to compromise.. But someone ultimately if not both of them won't be totally happy..
To @cinco 's point.. Maybe he needs to put a little finesse in how he deals with his lady.. But if that isn't the case.. He's gonna have to really think about whether he wants to continue dealing with her and she will have to do the same... He shouldn't feel like he can't get satisfied.. And she shouldn't feel like a ? after being intimate with her man.. This isn't about ? over a good woman.. It's about a relationship not working out.. It happens.. If this ultimately breaks them apart it'll give both of them the opportunity to find a partner that they are more compatible with.
so you don't think anybody should ever compromise with somebody They love in any relationship? And that's how you look at it if I don't get my way a hundred percent I'm unhappy? That's really sad. We just are going to disagree on a fundamentally basic level.
There's a disconnect.. Either your interpretation or my articulation (most likely my articulation) is throwing us off.. There are many instances where it's wise to compromise with your mate. I don't want to make it seem like compromising is a bad thing. However, in respect to the TS. It seems like sex is important to him and because of that he shouldn't compromise because if he does. He's going to end up unhappy in the long run. They are only 6 months in. What happens in the future when life starts to get in the way? It seems that she already isn't as big on sex as he is. What happens when they have children and/or careers to tend to?
If they are only 6 months in then he should compromise. What if in another 6 months sex isn't as important to him and he's now let his former sex drive deny him an opportunity to be with a good woman.
I think us men should take time to evaluate how we are moving and the things we think are important in a relationship for the long haul.
I have made this mistake a couple times in the past. And I am truly thankful that I got the opportunity to be gifted with another jewel. I know plenty of dudes that have yet to recover.
Real ? . That's the thing I'm fine with compromising. She has compromised with PLENTY of things with me, so I'm willing to work on me . -
I didn't think to even ask how old you were @silverfoxx ? Do you think that you are mentally mature enough to deal w/ compromising/sacrificing your personal needs for this woman? Will she or would she do the same for you?
good question.......has it been tested on her end?
but then again.....timing may not be right for it to come up.
eyyy...this question is not so good when i think about it -
i'm proud this didnt turn into a troll thread
ya'll growing up IC
salute
#nobawse
LMAO I got trolled heavy last time, and I'm sure someone will come in. But I'll take the postives (which have been ALOT) in this thread and salute the real. -
Also from experience find somebody your speed
Aka test drive the car before you buy it...you test drove this car and it's cool but it's a 4cyclinder automatic and you like 6 speed manuals....
There are women on a similar level sex wise and everything else important to not have to compromise to the point where your making threads ...
I compromise on what's for dinner, color of the blinds, vacation destinations, not sex
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2stepz_ahead wrote: »silverfoxx wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »^^^just know....
a woman can have a higher sex drive and make you just want to be held and not sexed all the time.
? in here lying or aint been around enough.
i had a chick..i had to tap out and try to keep her ass busy with other ? ....chick drained me dehydrated to the point i needed eye drops just to blink
That's the thing, I've dated chicks in the past that done the same thing to me, but I didn't love them or could see myself with them. So with my girl now I'm at least willing to compromise just to see where this ? goes first before I press the panic button and blow it up. She told me how she felt, said she wanted normacy and didn't wanna feel like everything is a sexual expectation. I never noticed I made her feel that way, but now I do I'll work around it or like I said just not show any sexual desire until she wants to make love with me. If that don't work, THEN I'll consider truly looking at the relationship fabric.
Good ass will make you miss alot of things....lol
but she gave an honest reason and sounds like she doesnt want her ? abused to the point its no longer usable or enjoyable.
makes sense.
no one wants they ? lips looking like a cheesesteak.
just look a it like...at least she was honest and you know she has school.
encourage her schooling and continue the courtship.
Will do my G
The thing is my life has been out of whack, I truly believe once things get in order for me we will both become better. So I'm honestly optimistic. Just trying to figure out how to calm myself down sexually a bit. But I believe I can because last thing I wanna do is lose out on her. -
silverfoxx wrote: »atribecalledgabi wrote: »silverfoxx wrote: »atribecalledgabi wrote: »@silverfoxx is your gf on birth control? If so that could be a reason why her sex drive took a dip.
Yes she is, also she heavy into school so like I said, maybe it's me tripping and not being understanding, I'll try to be a understanding partner. Already accepted that fact that I'm probably not going to get physical for like a month or two. I'll just let her be the aggressor .
Do you know how long she been on bc? Also does she take other meds? The mix of bc with other scripts + the stress of school....and on top of that her diet might be trash too (or just different than when y'all first got together) due to the environment....it all might just be hormonal at the end of the day. Nothing to do with you.
She actually warned me of this before. I honestly should have caught the signs. And yes her diet is very inconsistent and she takes bc and some other ? . I'll try to find out .
Yea man the pill can have a crazy effect on our bodies. If that's the case, if possible, try to see what kind she takes and see if she'd consider something with a lower dose or non hormonal.
But finesse it...don't all of a sudden start fake caring about that ? cuz she'll know it's just cuz you wana ? lol -
Alrite ? i done solved the case in 2 posts yall can go ahead now with your titangraphs and supreme wisdom
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2stepz_ahead wrote: »silverfoxx wrote: »SMH @ my self ether. My personal life (? I don't want people to care about) is getting more views and responses then my music artisic threads(? I only want people to care about)
I gotta start fooling and finessing the IC on some Nigerian scam ? huh? Lol
misery loves company bruh.
exposure bringing the boys to the yard. lol
but when you trying to do something positive.....take that ? elsewhere...smdh.
? gonna nig
LMAO bruh I'm seriously trying to understanding marketing and why folks tend to give more attention to ? I don't want them to care about and not to ? I ? spend HOURS and days and months working on. ? is the most frustrating feeling ever. Like ? tell me I'ma wack ass producer or something, just ? listen to it lol. -
atribecalledgabi wrote: »Alrite ? i done solved the case in 2 posts yall can go ahead now with your titangraphs and supreme wisdom
Haha appreciate it my G -
atribecalledgabi wrote: »Alrite ? i done solved the case in 2 posts yall can go ahead now with your titangraphs and supreme wisdom
you right....love you but you get on my nerves with your sexi GOATness. -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »atribecalledgabi wrote: »Alrite ? i done solved the case in 2 posts yall can go ahead now with your titangraphs and supreme wisdom
you right....love you but you get on my nerves with your sexi GOATness.
And you know I was talking specifically about you with that post lol -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »I didn't think to even ask how old you were @silverfoxx ? Do you think that you are mentally mature enough to deal w/ compromising/sacrificing your personal needs for this woman? Will she or would she do the same for you?
good question.......has it been tested on her end?
but then again.....timing may not be right for it to come up.
eyyy...this question is not so good when i think about it
Yeah it may still be too early to properly answer this question. I've been in 2 long term relationships in my life, and I can tell you that be it 6 months or 6 years...timing plays an important role. Sometimes you don't know that you're on a sinking ? until you hit rougher waters. I was with my son's mother for years and she failed miserably under pressure. My daughter's mother and I have been through waaay more ? than me and my son's mother. She's battle tested like a mf in a much shorter period of time. We both learned a lot about ourselves in dealing w/ each other, and that's made us both better partners overall. We've both made sacrifices and compromises for each other and it worked out because it was reciprocated and the reciprocation was real not forced. Can't say the same for my son's mother though...but I digress. -
atribecalledgabi wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »atribecalledgabi wrote: »Alrite ? i done solved the case in 2 posts yall can go ahead now with your titangraphs and supreme wisdom
you right....love you but you get on my nerves with your sexi GOATness.
And you know I was talking specifically about you with that post lol
if you was or wasnt.....
i aint fukking with you. you keep it 100 an will kick a ? ass verbally.
i dont need those problems right now. -
Being raised from NO, sex is something that is super open and casual
This is not uniquely NO ? ... welcome to earth -
I love all these old and married ? in the thread talking bout they'd be out or cheat. Like none of y'all have had a woman not want to ? as much. I expect it from young ? but either the vast majority of you are complete trash (I haven't ruled that out) or you're fronting like a mfker.
@Westie said
https://youtu.be/U4c5UU9SLSE -
silverfoxx wrote: »silverfoxx wrote: »atribecalledgabi wrote: »@silverfoxx is your gf on birth control? If so that could be a reason why her sex drive took a dip.
Yes she is, also she heavy into school so like I said, maybe it's me tripping and not being understanding, I'll try to be a understanding partner. Already accepted that fact that I'm probably not going to get physical for like a month or two. I'll just let her be the aggressor .
Bruh, I know you young but I just have to stop you here. Listen, live and learn, thats what its ultimately about, but this is not how its done. You dont have your girl say yall having too much sex and then you decide to not have sex at all for a month. Thats how relationships end.
Soon as you do that, your girl gonna be like yo wtf? And you gonna say yo thats what you wanted, and she gonna say you totally misunderstood her.
Just relax, and let this pass over, and let ? happen naturally. Chill with her, do what yall do, and if it turns to sex cool. Just dont go and make it about sex.
Word. Appreciate you catching me before I do dumb ? . How do I not make it by sex though? The thing is I don't wanna scare her or make her feel like a ? object. I'm cool with just chilling and to quote you "do what we do" but she was the one who told me that she will be the aggressor and for me to chill. I'm low-key confused on how to respond to this .
Bruh, chances are its not about you at all and she got other ? going on so just be cool, tell her what she wants to hear and in a month yall back to normal -
It's early in the relationship 2... s he may be doing this to see if "u love her and it's not just about sex... who knows
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the question I have is sex the only issue where ya'll having a disconnect
cuz either u might not know how to interact with her without trying to ? all the time
or there are other issues beneath the surface, and everything is just a veil of getting along until u try to bust it open
not enough details to really know -
i'm proud this didnt turn into a troll thread
ya'll growing up IC
salute
#nobawse
@Silverfoxxx "u share that girl" -
blakfyahking wrote: »the question I have is sex the only issue where ya'll having a disconnect
cuz either u might not know how to interact with her without trying to ? all the time
or there are other issues beneath the surface, and everything is just a veil of getting along until u try to bust it open
not enough details to really know
Yes pretty much. No other disconnections. We had some and worked passed every issues.
