What would you do?
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an stay away from people promising you ....you can make $1000 a day
or $2000 a night....
both are the same thing -
SimplyKrys wrote: »Elzo69Renaissance wrote: »Oh and he def ? somebody else
It's funny that you would say this because a few months ago my mom's bf called me and told me that he is cheating on me and I was like, ? gtfoh how do you know that? And he was like we have people, we just don't want you to get hurt. I honestly thought that he was just making that ? up because he does not like my bf.
they've seen him around. I mean... how many more signs do you need???
Cut your losses, bounce to another state across the country and start over. -
2stepz_ahead wrote: »seems to me....
the very thing you hated about your mom.....you just became.
if she ain't got heat or electric an she got a ? ....he aint taking care if home.
sound familiar.
we already talked about this.
you need to leave dude, start off small...maybe in cheap apartments and relocate to that place.
look online for a job elsewhere....if you get it...you already have the money to move. negotiate a deal with a local extended stay hotel or something. move your things into storage, and bounce.
you don't owe an explanation to anyone once you roll.
afterwards. you need to surround yourself with more positive people and people who will bring positive influence into your life to help with your self esteem.
it seems your esteem was already low and you got into something that ? it a bit more.
don't sacrifice who you are because of your financial situation. you sacrifice your financial situation because of who you are. that's more important.
These are some powerful words. To be honest with you, going on my own scares me but I need to face my fear. -
SimplyKrys wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »seems to me....
the very thing you hated about your mom.....you just became.
if she ain't got heat or electric an she got a ? ....he aint taking care if home.
sound familiar.
we already talked about this.
you need to leave dude, start off small...maybe in cheap apartments and relocate to that place.
look online for a job elsewhere....if you get it...you already have the money to move. negotiate a deal with a local extended stay hotel or something. move your things into storage, and bounce.
you don't owe an explanation to anyone once you roll.
afterwards. you need to surround yourself with more positive people and people who will bring positive influence into your life to help with your self esteem.
it seems your esteem was already low and you got into something that ? it a bit more.
don't sacrifice who you are because of your financial situation. you sacrifice your financial situation because of who you are. that's more important.
These are some powerful words. To be honest with you, going on my own scares me but I need to face my fear.
It is more liberating than it is scary. -
BiblicalAtheist wrote: »SimplyKrys wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »seems to me....
the very thing you hated about your mom.....you just became.
if she ain't got heat or electric an she got a ? ....he aint taking care if home.
sound familiar.
we already talked about this.
you need to leave dude, start off small...maybe in cheap apartments and relocate to that place.
look online for a job elsewhere....if you get it...you already have the money to move. negotiate a deal with a local extended stay hotel or something. move your things into storage, and bounce.
you don't owe an explanation to anyone once you roll.
afterwards. you need to surround yourself with more positive people and people who will bring positive influence into your life to help with your self esteem.
it seems your esteem was already low and you got into something that ? it a bit more.
don't sacrifice who you are because of your financial situation. you sacrifice your financial situation because of who you are. that's more important.
These are some powerful words. To be honest with you, going on my own scares me but I need to face my fear.
It is more liberating than it is scary.
It's scary for me because I have never fully been on my own, the closest I have ever came is when I rented a room out from 2009-2011 when I first left my moms house. At first even that was scary but I got used to it. -
"What would you do?"
Get up on my feet, stop making tired excuses/
What would you do?/
Girl, I know if my mother can do it, baby, you can do it/
-
SimplyKrys wrote: »BiblicalAtheist wrote: »SimplyKrys wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »seems to me....
the very thing you hated about your mom.....you just became.
if she ain't got heat or electric an she got a ? ....he aint taking care if home.
sound familiar.
we already talked about this.
you need to leave dude, start off small...maybe in cheap apartments and relocate to that place.
look online for a job elsewhere....if you get it...you already have the money to move. negotiate a deal with a local extended stay hotel or something. move your things into storage, and bounce.
you don't owe an explanation to anyone once you roll.
afterwards. you need to surround yourself with more positive people and people who will bring positive influence into your life to help with your self esteem.
it seems your esteem was already low and you got into something that ? it a bit more.
don't sacrifice who you are because of your financial situation. you sacrifice your financial situation because of who you are. that's more important.
These are some powerful words. To be honest with you, going on my own scares me but I need to face my fear.
It is more liberating than it is scary.
It's scary for me because I have never fully been on my own, the closest I have ever came is when I rented a room out from 2009-2011 when I first left my moms house. At first even that was scary but I got used to it.
You will do great! You will love your own space and you have the IC, we'll be here to help or laugh. -
SimplyKrys wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »seems to me....
the very thing you hated about your mom.....you just became.
if she ain't got heat or electric an she got a ? ....he aint taking care if home.
sound familiar.
we already talked about this.
you need to leave dude, start off small...maybe in cheap apartments and relocate to that place.
look online for a job elsewhere....if you get it...you already have the money to move. negotiate a deal with a local extended stay hotel or something. move your things into storage, and bounce.
you don't owe an explanation to anyone once you roll.
afterwards. you need to surround yourself with more positive people and people who will bring positive influence into your life to help with your self esteem.
it seems your esteem was already low and you got into something that ? it a bit more.
don't sacrifice who you are because of your financial situation. you sacrifice your financial situation because of who you are. that's more important.
These are some powerful words. To be honest with you, going on my own scares me but I need to face my fear.
fear is a method of mind control. you will learn alot about yourself by being on your own.
you don't know what or who you are if you never had to face odds alone.
you need a mentor or some guidance. someone to walk you thru this.
yes. it's scary. but loving yourself should not be an option you need to think about.
someone talked about the mirror.
let's try this....look in the mirror, and ask yourself ...are you important?
are you happy?
is this what you want?
is he touching you like you want?
saying the words you want to hear?
planning a future, you are apart of?
do you see love in his eyes?
do you feel passion in his touch?
going out his way to think of you first?
are you a temple that deserves respect?
does he worship your temple?
do you respect yourself?
can you do it by yourself?
try to give honest answers to yourself without crying.
record yourself asking yourdelf these questions.
look at it...how do you look? how do you feel about how you look.
-
next question...
what do you really want out of life?
where do you want to go?
where do you see yourself in ,5 years. -
1. Count ya blessing you ain't pregnant by this ?
2. Bounce before you end up holding a life long L and get pregnant by this ?
3. If ? is this bad now, you should've realized a while ago it won't get no better. You don't even need to be in a relationship right now. Your focus should be on you and your own life getting better. A relationship takes time, energy, and focus you simply should be putting into your career at this point -
konceptjones wrote: »You two been together for a few months short of 11 years and y'all ain't married?
At this point you're just live-in ? ; nothing more, nothing less. He's pretty much said that much. It's time to stop ? around with your life and move on before this cat introduces you to his 3 year old son and 6 month old daughter by some broad named "Alize".
So what? -
konceptjones wrote: »You two been together for a few months short of 11 years and y'all ain't married?
At this point you're just live-in ? ; nothing more, nothing less. He's pretty much said that much. It's time to stop ? around with your life and move on before this cat introduces you to his 3 year old son and 6 month old daughter by some broad named "Alize".
So what?
It's unusual. Couple that with the other details provided and it's a dead giveaway.
She deserves more. -
Yeah ? going so well, they should be married right ?
Chick practically screaming she got tons of other ? to deal with and marriage is supposed to be the answer ? -
marriage is not always the solution.
especially for people just gettung married after kids an break ups and thinkinh she cute now -
Not to sound like an elitist or some ? but he sounds beneath you
I would seek a replacement -
SimplyKrys wrote: »
That's ? . I make 25 an hr in a field that doesn't require a degree. Engineers make way ? more than that -
SimplyKrys wrote: »Okay so here's the deal, I have been with my bf since 6/22/06 and I currently live with him, his mom, his dad, his brother, his brother's gf and their 8 y.o. son in his mom's house. I have been living here since 4/12/12 after moving out of my drug (dust) addicted cousin's house after one of her stoner friends tried to get some na-na while I was trying to sleep one night. Ever since I have been living here I graduated college, and saved up a little over $9,000 for an apartment. I finished college in December of 2015 and unfortunately I still don't have a job in my field (journalism).
There are times where my bf likes to say, "You are not related to anyone at the house," "You have a place to live because of me" and "Your time here is short." He has not said any of those things in a while but he has said those things more than once. My mom says that I can come back home but I'd rather not because she lives in a ratchet apartment with no heat or running water. On top of that I can't stand her bf and he's the main reason why I moved out in the first place, when I moved out we got into a big fight and they said that he (my bf) is going to start beating my ass.
Back in December he said that he was going to move out in January, but that turned out to be b.s. because he's still here. Honestly I think he just said that to scare me. On top of all of that his dad says that him and the mom are going to be going back to Haiti in about a year in a half and if no one takes over the house then he will sell it. About three weeks ago my bf even called me "convenient ? ." Fast forward to now and all of a sudden we are getting along much better but at the same time I know I need to leave these people's house. The only reason I am really still here is because I work part time at a restaurant and I don't make nowhere near enough money to live on my own. A friend said to me as long as you pay your rent for a few months upfront you will be fine.
Yesterday he said that the only way he would consider getting a place with me is if I got a higher paying job. He said, "I don't want to live with you if you are still working at that restaurant and can't contribute."
My friend made the point that if he is making more than you, you shouldn't be splitting things down the middle he should be paying more for the rent and utilities.
So if you were me what would you do? Try to get a full time job and get a place with the bf....or say eff it and go totally on your own whether or not you get a higher paying job?
Keep it real...
Get your own place. You will be better for it: mind and soul. It sounds like you need to know that you don't depend on anyone and once you find out you can take care of yourself it will be priceless for you moving forward in life. If not you will always have to take listening to people say things about you that you don't like due to you depending on them for shelter.
As for whoever said: My friend made the point that if he is making more than you, you shouldn't be splitting things down the middle he should be paying more for the rent and utilities.
That's BS. Your Bf has made clear from what you wrote of him as to how he views your relationship as him carrying you and him wanting 50/50. If you don't agree with that then you and he have a financial disagreement.
As for job in your field you might want to consider: Maybe you need to leave whatever State your in. Go out and create your own stories on your phone or video conferencing or writing them. Have a portfolio of your work. Maybe a building is being torn down, maybe visit a City Council meeting and ask questions, maybe hang out by the police station and tell them who you are and follow a police car around on one of their runs and report on it. Maybe do a story on not having a job and wanting to break into journalism OR do a story on people in your neighborhood but make sure you have a message or theme to your story.
If you're still in school learn how to Edit video using Adobe or Final Cut.
Attend NBAJ conferences or any News conferences in your area.
-Send that portfolio out to Local News Stations or Cable News Stations. Ask to be a Video Journalist or Free Lance. Ask if you can meet someone (or find their name in their website and e-mail them asking if you can buy them coffee and talk to them for 10 minutes). Don't tell them about your current living situation.
As for his family letting you stay that long as a GF, well.........
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SimplyKrys wrote: »Elzo69Renaissance wrote: »how do u even have sex?
TBH we just have sex right in his bed..or on the chair.
Are you loud during sex?
Or do you wait until hardly anybody's home?
Seems like it would be awkward for you with so many people in the house.
Is it that you've been there so long that they're used to it by now or something? -
SimplyKrys wrote: »
That's ? . I make 25 an hr in a field that doesn't require a degree. Engineers make way ? more than that
bruh...
I debated on bussin on dude but ? it.
I worked as a senior engineer for a DoD contractor some years ago. I had cats walking in the door, fresh outta college with their EE or ME degrees working under me making $60K. When I went into the commercial sector entry level engineers were caking $60K-$70k easily.
Dude is out there in CT, lotta DoD contractors out that way. Boeing, Lockheed, PCX Aero, Honeywell, etc all out there so I wouldn't be surprised if he's working for one of them. Booz Allen is not far away in NY and RI; he can conceivably be working there too. -
BiblicalAtheist wrote: »SimplyKrys wrote: »BiblicalAtheist wrote: »SimplyKrys wrote: »2stepz_ahead wrote: »seems to me....
the very thing you hated about your mom.....you just became.
if she ain't got heat or electric an she got a ? ....he aint taking care if home.
sound familiar.
we already talked about this.
you need to leave dude, start off small...maybe in cheap apartments and relocate to that place.
look online for a job elsewhere....if you get it...you already have the money to move. negotiate a deal with a local extended stay hotel or something. move your things into storage, and bounce.
you don't owe an explanation to anyone once you roll.
afterwards. you need to surround yourself with more positive people and people who will bring positive influence into your life to help with your self esteem.
it seems your esteem was already low and you got into something that ? it a bit more.
don't sacrifice who you are because of your financial situation. you sacrifice your financial situation because of who you are. that's more important.
These are some powerful words. To be honest with you, going on my own scares me but I need to face my fear.
It is more liberating than it is scary.
It's scary for me because I have never fully been on my own, the closest I have ever came is when I rented a room out from 2009-2011 when I first left my moms house. At first even that was scary but I got used to it.
You will do great! You will love your own space and you have the IC, we'll be here to help or laugh.
-
Yeah ? going so well, they should be married right ?
Chick practically screaming she got tons of other ? to deal with and marriage is supposed to be the answer ?
being with someone that long and you haven't even made a move towards marriage says dude ain't trying to see her as his wife. She's just ? on tap; nothing more.
Truthfully, I don't understand people that have been with an S/O for over two years and ain't even engaged. At a certain point you're just wasting each other's time.
Bottom line, it shouldn't have even made it to this point. I understand the first two years 'cause they were in HS. I can even excuse the next 4 because of college (which is really a weak excuse, but whatever...), but past that? Nah B. -
I'm going to tell you exactly what to do. I promise it will work.
Go to the local psychiatric hospital and explain your situation. Tell them all of your problems and that you don't have a place to stay. It's illegal for a psychiatric hospital to release a homeless person back into the streets so they will have to take you in until THEY FIND YOU A PLACE TO STAY. At first they'll ask if you want to move into a group home or an assisted living facility. Say, "No, I want my own apartment". They will go over your finances and savings and help you get on your feet.
They will set you up in section 8 housing and help you get on food stamps and welfare if you need it.
The whole thing might take a month or maybe longer, so you'll be in a psych ward the whole time, but they'll separate you from the real crazy people because you're not really crazy, you're just homeless in a bad situation.
I know it works because I went through the whole thing a few years ago. I'm still in the projects but I went back to school and got my degree.
I couldn't have done it without the government. -
konceptjones wrote: »SimplyKrys wrote: »
That's ? . I make 25 an hr in a field that doesn't require a degree. Engineers make way ? more than that
bruh...
I debated on bussin on dude but ? it.
I worked as a senior engineer for a DoD contractor some years ago. I had cats walking in the door, fresh outta college with their EE or ME degrees working under me making $60K. When I went into the commercial sector entry level engineers were caking $60K-$70k easily.
Dude is out there in CT, lotta DoD contractors out that way. Boeing, Lockheed, PCX Aero, Honeywell, etc all out there so I wouldn't be surprised if he's working for one of them. Booz Allen is not far away in NY and RI; he can conceivably be working there too.
I chose the wrong ? field
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First off id try move in with a roomate as cheap room as u can get and leave ur BF for tryna guilt trip you n sayn ? up ? ...
He thinks he better than u..2 cars n job...but he lives with 38 Haitian imigrants...thats more than mexicans in 1 house...
